Give Me a Reason to Smile Again
by Cress Dreiser
Summary: It all started with Ai, Conan, and a day at school fingerpainting. Newton's third law claims for every action taken, there is an equal but opposite reaction. Oh the peace, quiet, and tranquility...Psh, yeah right.
1. Fingerpainting? You're Kidding, Right?

Ai walked in silence beside Conan, one of the privileged few people she dared even greet.

It wasn't that she was an unemotional block of ice that was mean and cruel to every person or thing she saw, but Ai was just a natural loner. She always preferred to be alone, to be left in her own business. One would think it gets tiring, always being alone, willingly observing others from the shadows, but this was the life she chose.

It didn't matter if she was eight, eighteen, twenty, or an eighty-two old person wrinkly and gray, living with sixteen cats in a musty run down apartment. She deserved it. In every corner of her mind, in every millimeter of her soul, Ai Haibara **knew** she deserved this. She would suffer alone with no one else around to bring down along with her. Shiho Miyano would repent for her sins. She didn't want this, but it had to be done.

And so, the young Haibara's once colorful view on life dimmed. She became colorblind. Not in the physical sense, but mentally. Shades of gray were all she saw. When one was bent on suffering to somehow earn the forgiveness of the dead, it happens.

If one would ask her what she'd think of kids going out of their way to please a parent, she'd tell them the parent most likely bribed the kid into obeying or perhaps the child was seeking praise.

If one asked her what she think of firemen, Ai would scoff and tell them the firemen were there to prove how incompetent people really were. How people always make mistakes and cause accidents.

Rainbows were no longer colorful and uplifting in spirit. Although they held the promise of worldwide floods to never happen again, the rainbow only existed because there was one. There was a worldwide flood that wiped out billions of men, women, and children. That so called beautiful rainbow reminded Ai of all the condemned souls.

And what about medicine? There couldn't possibly be anything wrong with that, right? Sure, she'd admit medicine saves lives, but given in wrong doses, they could also take lives.

Nothing was ever black and white anymore to her. There was always a bit of good in the bad, a bit of bad in the good.

Ai was **almost** starting to enjoy the repeatedly seen scenery they passed walking to school everyday when Conan spoke up.

"Haibara, why don't you ever smile? Every time I see you, it's either frowns, scowls, or no emotion at all."

"Because I never had a need to." She answered simply.

"Have you ever wished you did?"

"Kudo, enough with the nonsense." Ai frowned. Her breath would not be wasted on pointless questions. "I have other things to mull about other than a simple gesture such as a smile."

Conan immediately jumped at the chance to use her loophole to further prove his point. "See?"

"No, I don't see." Ai interrupted flatly. "All I see is your brain going to mush from continuously reciting the multiplication tables in class."

He ignored her comment. "If smiling is such a simple gesture to you, then why don't you ever do it?" They passed the gates of their school.

"I refer to my previous statement. Furthermore, I'd appreciate it if you'd stop interrogating me like a criminal and to cease your fruitless analyzing of my habits." The two arrived at the classroom and took their respective seats.

The teacher, whose name Ai never bothered to remember, had started class off with passing out speed drills with a three minute time limit. Ai took the paper, completed it, and wrote down how long it took her about the same time Conan did. They were so mind-numbingly simple. Her mind drifted back to the young detective's question.

**_"Haibara, why don't you ever smile? Every time I see you, it's either frowns, scowls, or no emotion at all."_**

_"What business is it of his?"_ Ai thought, trying to push her mind away from it. Try as she might, she couldn't help but replay the conversation in her mind.

**_"Have you ever wished you did?"_**

_"No, I haven't. Such foolish inquiries." _

_**"If smiling is such a simple gesture to you, then why don't you ever do it?" **_

Although Ai had told Conan she had no need for the simple gesture, truthfully, she didn't know. _"Is it really that hard for me to smile?" _She frowned. _"No, I've done that on multiple occasions." _Her lips were about to tilt up just to show she could, but then Ai stopped. _"Why do I feel the need to prove myself to him?"_ She allowed a soft sigh to escape her lips.

Discussing pointless questions in her head proved to be just as useless.

Once the class had turned in the speed drills, the teacher made an announcement. "Today, class, I have received special permission to redecorate the east wall of our school!" She exclaimed happily. "Each of you will have your own little section to do whatever you want by finger-painting. Doesn't that sound fun?"

All students but two erupted with joy. Conan looked at the teacher with that flat eyed stare of his, wondering if she was still sane. Ai diverted her sullen gaze out the window. _"There is no way I'd participate in that. Not even if the teacher drags me out there kicking and screaming."_

That afternoon, Ai found herself staring up at the courtyard wall with a dead panned expression on her face and a bowl for paint in her hands.

"Come on, Haibara, cheer up. I'm sure this'll be lots of fun." Conan tried to encourage her that it would be quite enjoyable, though his face stated otherwise. He grimaced at the sticky paint that landed in his face from some students who were carelessly flinging it around.

Genta, in particular, was having the time of his life chasing poor Mitsuhiko around with his paint covered hands. Ayumi bounced up to Conan and tried to get him with her own paint. Not wanting to get any more paint on himself than necessary, Conan sped off with Ayumi hot in pursuit. The teacher, on the other hand, was frantically attempting to restore order.

Ai stood there against the wall, avoiding any stray heaps of airborne paint. She scanned the wall to see if anyone had actually done what the teacher had intended for them to do.

Her ice blue eyes jumped from splotches of paint to the next when finally, her eyes settled onto a smiley face.

"_**If smiling is such a simple gesture to you, then why don't you ever do it?"**_

"_Not this again…How many times must you invade my mind, Kudo?" _On the inside Ai may have been a wave of bitterness, self-loathing, and confusion, but outwardly, she remained impassive as ever.

Conan had spotted her off to the side after he escaped Ayumi. Temporarily taking it upon him to make her business his, he saw fit to fabricate some other emotion from her regular ones. He snuck out of her line of vision.

Ai froze when something wet slid down her cheek. Her whole body stiffened considerably and the color in her face waned. _"Blood?"_ Having lived in fear and paranoia had taken its toll on her. Sometimes, even the simplest things would scare her. The creak in a door at night, the revving engine of a passing car and the tires screeching to a stop, footsteps behind her lone figure, gunshots, screams, and the dark, all of these had Ai expecting Gin and Vodka either killing or kidnapping someone.

Did you find it absurd for Ai to be afraid of the dark? One would think Ai, being a prodigy in the matters of science would be logical enough to rule out a young child's ever present fear of the dark and the creatures often imagined with it. Oh, but Ai does not believe in the boogeyman. She is a firm believer in darkness being a place where the light does not reach, a place devoid or partially devoid of light: not receiving, reflecting, transmitting, or radiating light.

Have you ever wondered why they call it the Black Organization? Why not the Japanese Mafia? Or the Underground? Actually, no one had officially declared them the Black Organization. It never had a name, not until some nut job came around and dubbed them that. The name just sort of stuck. A drunken nut job, actually. I believe I am confusing you now. Perhaps I should start from the beginning.

When every member is admitted into the organization, each is given a codename from an alcoholic beverage. Now, as always, there's bound to be an uncooperative person in every respectable syndicate and have their…disagreements with their superiors. And, naturally, they're punished.

Early punishments in the organization once included unbearable amount of physical assertion from the body, but they discovered psychological trauma proved much more effective. As such, members were punished by being locked in a soundproofed room in the dark with nothing to eat or drink but the alcoholic drink they were named after and a slab of cold bread. The time spent inside ranged from the severity of your…for lack of a better term, felony.

Before we came to know and love this stony ice cold Ai Haibara, she was once known as Shiho Miyano, better yet known to the organization as Sherry. Although she may have been only a child when she was forced to take her parents place in the syndicate to slave away at some poison she never intended to be used, let it be known that the Black's were ruthless.

When she first joined the organization by means of coercion, she was a hardheaded, stubborn, feisty, energetic little girl who would've ran up and down, around and about, screaming about her parents if given the chance. No matter how much any child specializes in a subject, the loss of loved ones will always turn them into just that. A child.

I'm pretty sure by now you can imagine the little Miyano struggling against her captors in a desperate attempt to run away with her beloved sister as foolish as it was.

"_I demand you to release me!" Little Shiho Miyano wriggled against the grown men with all her might that small body of hers could muster. Her short but slender legs flailed uncontrollably often catching her captors in the shins with her heels._

_The men remained impassively silent while hefting the indignant girl most likely twenty years younger than them and with an extensive vocabulary of colorful words. But just because they kept quiet the two didn't bother to hide the displeasure clearly etched onto their faces. _

_Next thing Shiho knew, she was flung into a room. She landed in an undignified heap on the floor, only to roll onto her side and glare icily over her shoulder at them. The only response she received was a smirk and slam of the door. _

_Silence and darkness greeted her. _

_Next few hours were torturous to little Shiho. Darkness clawed at her mind, trying to probe deep into her mind to force out her greatest fears. Her mind reeled with panic, filling every corner of her mind. _

_Her breathing came in small shuddering gasps, almost as if breathing too hard would release a merciless dog that would rip her to pieces and devour her without a second thought. She clenched her eyes shut and curled herself into a ball trying to escape from the glowing beady eyes in the back of her mind. Fear had clogged her mind from thinking clearly anymore. _

_Frantically, she stood up with no sense of balance and found the floor rising to smash into her face. Hand brushed over something smooth and cold. A soft clink was heard. Shiho's small hands immediately fumbled to grasp it in her hands. 'A bottle? Of what?'_

_She turned it over, and the liquid rushed down to fill the air. She nearly dropped it with her shaky hands. She ran her hands up the smooth cold glass until her hands brushed cork. With a bit of strength, she tugged it open. Apparently, it was already loosened. A strong smell of red wine came from the bottle. Shiho recognized it as "Sherry", the only drink she was allowed to have other than water. She was limited to four cups of water whenever she misbehaved and had to drink this "Sherry". She tried to avoid it as much as possible. _

_Shiho's eyes nearly rolled to the back of her head from the smell alone. Her eyelids fluttered a bit before she re-corked the bottle. The girl hacked a bit before setting the wine bottle down gently and rolling it away from her. Shiho's face wrinkled in disgust but also sunk in disappointment. She desperately wished for something to break her out from this room that was devoid of light._

_Slowly, the primal fear grew in the back of her mind…it threatened to swallow her in the darkness. She could help but wonder with each passing second if she was locked down here with a trained serial killer or maybe assassin. It definitely felt as if someone was watching her. But that was impossible wasn't it? The answer was so incredibly simple that she could've smacked herself for not realizing it sooner if she wasn't so afraid._

_Inferred cameras._

_Suddenly, head was pulled back and something was pressed against her neck. It came as fast as it went. _

_Something wet slid down her cheek._

_Ice blue eyes widened in fear. What was in here with her?_

"Haibara?" Conan's worried face peered into hers. He hadn't seen her this worried since the last time they had a close encounter with a member of the Black Organization.

Ai snapped to attention when he entered her line of vision. Her fingers slowly reached up to her face. She hesitantly touched the wet trail down her cheek and pulled her hand down to examine.

Blue paint.

Any women fearing-man that put self-preservation as one of his priorities would've immediately seen how the intensity in Ai's ice blue eyes went up a few notches. The cause of this could've ranged from anger to lust, but seeing as how Ai looked as if she wanted strangle Conan, it was safe to say it was probably one of the angry emotions.

As much as Conan loved being detective, he didn't feel like sticking around long enough to identify the specific emotion that flashed across her face. Ai was never one to easily lose her composure over little things, but apparently, smearing blue paint in her face might have been an exception.

"Kudo…" She growled out.

That was all the encouragement Conan needed to run away from the normally calm Ai Haibara.

Ai ran after the miniature detective, her lips pursed into a determined line. She dashed past Ayumi and grabbed the bowl of paint from her hands.

Pink paint.

"_Perfect…"_

Moments later, Ai collapsed onto the school's courtyard breathing heavily as she appraised her new work of art. She watched as a flustered Conan, splattered head to toe in pink, scramble back and forth out of embarrassment, trying not to be seen.

She ducked her head to hide the smile that was beginning to form, but it didn't quite get there. A shadow suddenly enveloped her small figure.

Looking up, she found not Gin, not Vodka, but a certain Conan Edogawa standing over her with an entire bucket of paint in his hands.

Even with her face flushed crimson and panting from exhaustion, Ai managed to shoot up at him her dead panned stare. "Kudo, you wouldn't dare."

"Justice will prevail." He grinned.

The two were back up and running in no time flat.

"It was a joke!" Came the panicked cry from Conan. "Smile and laugh already!"

Blue paint covered Ai stopped and glared at his retreating form in the iciest manner she could. "If he held it so dear to himself as to see me participate in this activity…" She muttered darkly under her breath. She walked over to the table full of art supplies, grabbed the first thing she could reach –the gray paint- and dumped it into her hands. Moving over to the wall, she smeared the gray onto a blank space on the wall that no one had yet to splatter with airborne paint.

"That should satisfy him." Ai glared at the gray smear on the wall as if her misfortune was all its fault. She turned and made her way to the restroom to make herself at least halfway decent when she entered Agasa's home.

That afternoon Ai was still irked over what had happened even after a somewhat relaxing bath. She was lucky the professor had thought of making his own specialized shampoo to wash out anything or else the paint would have been an absolute nightmare to wash out. _"Hopefully, Kudo wasn't as lucky."_ She thought darkly.

She sat in front of her computer watching what seemed to be an endless amount of formulas and different combinations pour down her screen. She had her head propped on one hand, her eyes effortlessly following each line.

**_"Smile and laugh already!"_**

_"Why did he have to go and say something like that…?"_ Ai massaged her temples in annoyance. _"I-The last time I heard it was when Gin hissed into my ear…" _Her face screwed up in disgust as her mind drifted back to the memory which was so clearly scorched into her brain.

_"Sherry." _

_The seventeen year old Shiho in a lab coat with a clipboard in one hand paused to see Gin walk over to her with a slight swagger in his steps. "My dear Sherry, how have you been?" He asked with a smile. But Shiho was not to be deceived. She knew his intentions were anything but to find out about her well being. Besides, who would trust someone whose smile had a malicious edge to it? Besides the fact he proclaimed himself to be her boyfriend and soon-to-be-murderer at the same time...  
_

_She ignored him and turned in the opposite direction to avoid a confrontation with him. Not that it did her any good, it was already too late. His hand shot out and latched onto her wrist applying a painful amount of pressure. Wincing, she stopped in her tracks. "Gin, let go of me now." She demanded in a low voice._

_"I don't think I will, Sherry." _

_She felt him lift her hair from the back, weaving his fingers through it. Thoroughly disgusted now, she whipped around seeing the same crazed look in his eyes she saw every time. He always did want to kill. More specifically, kill her. He was making her extremely uncomfortable. No one touched her. No one but family._

_Her ice blue eyes narrowed. "You are, without a doubt, the absolutely most nauseating piece of filth I have even had the distinct displeasure to meet." Shiho spat out bitterly. She tried to yank her arm away but to no avail._

_She was suddenly swung around violently, her back slamming into a wall. Her hand was held above her head. She reflexively brought up the clipboard in her other hand to act as a shield from Gin. Stars clouded her vision but her mind immediately cleared when his disturbingly hot breath caressed her face. Thankfully, her clipboard kept Gin from getting any further than he already was._

"_Sherry, my sweet precious red wine, you are indeed intoxicating to your fullest." His smile stretched further at one corner, turning into a malicious smirk. Gin had trapped her from all sides, cutting off any means of escape. He pressed closer. "Smile and laugh for me will you, dearest?" He whispered into her ear. "I want to see you smile and laugh before I hear your screams of death. I'll cherish the memory, the memory of seeing the bottle of Sherry shatter and the red wine from inside staining the carpet." _

"_Let me go, Gin." She repeated. "Release me now."_

"_And what if I refuse? Will you smile and laugh for me then?" _

"_Let. Me. Go. Now." Her icy tone of anger was unmistakable. _

_He complied and stepped back only to strike the side of her face. **"Smile and laugh already!"** He shrieked as she fell from the sheer force of the blow and slid across the floor. Her clipboard clattered onto the floor.** "I want to see you smile! I want to see you laugh! I want to see you die!" **A few moments silence then Gin took a deep breath and calmed down considerably. He fished out a cigarette from his pocket and lit the 'death in a packet'. He looked down at her with his most charming smile, a warm caring smile that clashed with his cold distant eyes._

"_Smile for me, Shiho."_

_She forced a tired and used smile onto her face and watched his satisfied form turn around and walk away, carelessly tossing a switchblade he found in his pocket up and down, leaving her alone with a cheek mostly likely bruised and swollen. _

A soft knock interrupted her thoughts. Ai whirled around only to remember her door was locked. She hopped out of her chair to find out who wanted her while calming her heart that seemed to leap into her throat.

A certain Conan Edogawa was standing at her door shuffling his feet with his head down. Ai could see in his neatly kept black hair that some flecks of pink still remained. Conan took a hesitant look at her, and Ai raised an eyebrow. He ducked his head down again and took that as a cue to start speaking.

"I'm…really sorry for getting you so upset today. I was just carried away. I'm really sorry, I was having a small bit of fun and thought you might liked to be included…I know you don't like socializing or acting like a little kid, but-no, I'm sorry. I should've known better. I'll do anything you want in return to make up for it."

Ai was at first, shocked. The great Shinichi Kudo apologizing? It took less then one second to regain her typical cool composure. "Kudo…" She started.

"Hmm?" He looked up at her through his bangs.

"I know how you can make it up to me." A side of her lips lifted.

"What is it?" He asked while wondering what was going through that mind of hers to make her smirk like that.

"I want to see you run ten laps around the park, swim four laps around the pool, drink an entire gallon of water, do one hundred sit ups, sixty push ups, pick up my groceries from various places, and endure an entire hour of Mouri-san's soap operas."

Conan's face had gone from apologetic to a pale horror stricken expression. "A-are you serious? That's what would make you happy?" He spluttered. "Torturing me is what would satisfy you? That's sadistic…"

Ai's smirk only widened. "Thank you. I am very well aware of what that is." She turned and closed the door behind her. "Meet me at the park in ten minutes." The door clicked shut.

The poor miniature detective was left gaping at her door.


	2. Smiling is an Action to Please Others

"Good. You're very punctual, Kudo." Ai Hiabara was sitting on one of the park's wooden benches while she watched Conan arrive on his solar powered skateboard. "Not wanting to exert yourself any more than necessary, hmm?" She asked, eyeing his skateboard.

Conan hesitantly stopped in front of her looking confused. "You mean…it wasn't all an act?" He blinked. "So you didn't have something important to tell me after all? Something for instance like, oh, I don't know. Nothing secretive?" Ai raised an eyebrow at him. "Let me get this straight," He continued. "You brought me out here not because of wanting to tell me something no one else could overhear, but to have me actually run, swim, and watch Detective Baka's soap operas?"

Ai stood up and resisted the urge to roll her eyes. Must he always assume an ulterior motive in everyone? "I'm extremely relieved you reached these conclusions by yourself, Kudo. I thought it might have been too hard for you to comprehend. You might be able to give Mouri-san a run for his money with that intellect of yours." She rolled out a bicycle hidden from behind the bench.

Conan huffed, not believing he came out here for nothing. He thought Ai had completed the antidote or something. "Sheesh…don't mislead a guy like that." He turned to jet off on his skateboard. There was no way he was going to stick around to have her torture him like she promised.

"One moment, Kudo." She motioned him over to the bike. "I suppose you weren't really serious about your apology. No matter, stand here before you go. I want to conduct a little experiment regarding the antidote." She went back behind the bench to retrieve something.

The little detective's mood immediately brightened. "Well, why didn't you say so in the first place?" The boy practically bounced to the spot. "Haibara, not to complain or anything, but shouldn't all your experiments be made inside that stuffy room of yours?"

She came back with a jump rope in her hands, ignoring his question. "Hold one end, will you?" Conan readily complied and took it in both hands. She looped it around his arms and hands tightly with a knot then turned to the bike.

Conan wasn't so sure for his personal safety now. He had been involved with plenty of homicides that had either the victim or murder with rope. For some reason he couldn't discern, his self-preservation senses were tingling like mad as if someone had just attempted to shove him over the side of a building. Strange wasn't it? Yes, he decided. It was indeed strange how Ai had tied his hands together like this. And now she's…tying the other end to the bike? His curiosity could only be quenched for so long. Conan had to find out why, but he also had to word it in a way that would not grate on Ai's nerves.

"Say, Haibara? How's adding me as your bike's new accessory going to help you with your experiment?" Yeah, being honest and tactful –read blunt and tactless- was definitely the way to go. He completely ignored the fact that Ai could have possibly still been angry at him and was just hiding it. He silently congratulated himself on a job well done.

Ai kept silent until she climbed onto the bike. "I hope you run just as fast as I can pedal. It'd be a tragedy for the park's reputation to have your face smeared onto its ground." With those final words, she took off.

To all those reading this, pity poor little Conan. For a scientist that would seem to have been cooped up in a laboratory all her life, Ai handles a bike pretty well. Never mind where she learned how to ride one. Besides, I have never seen a boy of Conan's age run at such astonishing speeds. I don't think the people they passed by had either.

"_One truth will prevail."_ A saying Shinichi and Conan would both proudly proclaim. The one truth? All women are body-breaking slave drivers when angry. And right now, both would agree that Ai has a streak of deviousness locked away inside her that was for some unknown reason, released today in the form of energy. Well, not quite so unknown, but at least he knew how Ai stayed so thin all the time. Either that or she's got a fast metabolism.

Ai skidded to a halt after the ten promised laps and heard Conan faceplant into the ground. She looked at him thoughtfully for a bit. "Hmm…at this rate, the accelerated growth process the bio chemicals in the antidote cause would pop his heart faster than a tack would a balloon. I'll have to reconsider that." She mumbled to herself. Sighing, she untied the dying Conan who was suffering from lack of oxygen circulating through his respiratory system because he was taking in deep gasps of dirt. Ai plopped down beside Conan on the ground and helped him sit upright.

She wiped the sweat off her forehead with the back of her hand and took in a deep breath of fresh air. "_How long was it since I actually lived?"_ Another sigh. _"Oh, right. When Akemi was here. They say the longer you hold onto memories of the dead, the longer it takes for them to move onto the afterlife. But how can I be sure the afterlife is an enjoyable place? What if I was sending my sister into the depths of Hell? No. I can't think like that. Akemi was a good person. Yeah…**was**. Of course, good deeds alone aren't enough to get you to Heaven either. Then again…how can I believe in an afterlife when everything I trust requires proof?" _Ai closed her eyes. She wouldn't cry over the mere memory of her sister in front of Conan. Once was enough.

"_Right, back to figuring out Kudo's little dilemma. Now, I could alter the variables in my equation to make it work…cut down from quality into quantity. He could take it one after the other day by day for a week instead of just all at once. But that would be much too time consuming to rearrange the formula, not to mention highly expensive. On the other hand, I could set up an exercising routine that would have Kudo back into shape and beyond, so his body could take the stress."_

She glanced over at the gasping Conan who had fallen over in the grass, looking like he was about to pass out. Ai looked away with a small sweatdrop rolling down her head.

"_I believe the latter just might take a while longer than expected." _

A hand suddenly lashed out and gripped her wrist. Ai's mind immediately leaped to full alert, the contact was like electricity rushing through her veins, shocking every siren into action in its path to her brain. But as usual, Ai could mask anything with that poker face of hers. She didn't even jump a centimeter. Calmly, she reached down and pried Conan's shaky hand off her wrist and asked coolly, "Yes, Kudo?"

"I…need…water!" He rasped out like one of those rotting zombies she once saw in Genta and Mitsuhiko's video games. He pointed to his pocket, indicating where his wallet was.

Ai gave him a dead panned expression. "I'd be more then willing to get you something to drink, but I draw the line at sticking my hand into your pocket to do so."

Conan's face might have already been tinted red from exertion, but now it went scarlet from embarrassment. "D-don't put words into m-my mo-mouth like that." He said in between breaths. He pulled the wallet out by himself and handed it to her. "Anything's fine."

Ai went off in search of a vending machine but not before taking the bike with her. "_If he was putting on an act so he could find a chance to escape, I'll catch him and make the baka suffer."_ Anyway, back to searching for a vending machine. "_I know we passed one or two on that last turn back there…"_

Ai returned with his drink not a minute later, wanting to see if he had actually run away. She was genuinely surprised to find him sitting in the same spot where she had left him and was keeping himself occupied by pulling apart bits of grass then tossing the bundle into the wind.

She almost smiled.

"Careful." Ai started in a light tone, observing his actions. "A beautician might do the same to your hair one day." She paused. "Then again, my warning might have been a tad too late." She sat down beside him.

Conan made a face at her and gave a sarcastic laugh. "Har, har. Real funny, Haibara. I've laughed myself into stitches." He took the drink from her then gulped down its contents greedily. In one gulp he drained half the can. "Though…I do believe that's the first time you've ever cracked a joke before." He grinned.

"Oh, shame on me." Ai drawled out in her usual sarcastic tone. "Have I brought the Apocalypse a century too early?" She watched him take another swig of his orange juice.

"Don't drink too much." She warned him. "You might get cramps when swimming."

His eyes widened from shock and he spit out the liquid from his mouth to keep from choking. "You mean there's more? More of this torture?" Conan exclaimed with disbelief. "How could you be so utterly black hearted?"

Ai's nose wrinkled in disgust as a few drops hit her as well as from his choice of words. "I'm sure the plant life here really appreciated your generous donation of orange juice. The grass in particular." She added.

"Never mind the grass! What's this got to do with your antidote?" He asked indignantly. "Was there a scientific breakthrough? Were you inspired in some way by watching me run? Because if it's not enough, I'll gladly swim nine laps around the public swimming pool for you too!" He finished sardonically.

"I wasn't considering staying out in public for so long but since you offered…We'll join Professor Agasa who swims everyday around this time. Don't tell Ran-san where you're going." She stood and brushed herself off in a brisk manner. "You have eight minutes this time. I expect you to be at Professor Agasa's changed and ready to go before I get there."

Conan didn't even bother to argue. He had a deadline to make and being late sure wasn't going to make Ai smile. Not that she did anyways. He scampered off to find his skateboard.

Ai watched him scramble around like a chicken with its head cut off. Just this once, she'd be merciful and give him, oh, say…one extra minute. She sat down in the grass again, being careful not to touch Conan's patch of orange juice sprinkled grass. Ai brought her legs up to her chest and wrapped her arms around them. _"I really shouldn't be out here by myself." _The thought popped into her mind._ "There's always a chance I could be spotted, though I doubt any self-respecting member would be caught dead in the middle of a park."_ She didn't seem very worried outwardly though. Of course, that was our expressionless Ai. Being able to mask her emotions with a blank face would seem like a good trait, but it's a strange thing to be seen on kids. But I believe we all know masks don't just appear over night. They slowly develop over a period of time.

Masks come in all different shape and sizes. Some are happy, some are sad. Masks are often used for one basic purpose: to hide what's underneath it. You may ask why. I may ask why. Heck, you might even ask me why. Well, the reasons vary from one person to the next.

As for Ai, it's because she's lost all reason to smile. She didn't wish to lose any more reasons to show her other emotions, so she hid them. She hid them somewhere deep in her heart until her face forgot how to form those emotions. She wouldn't give anyone a chance to take away her other emotions. The little scientist knows that once something is proven illogical, it's time to dump it and move on towards the next thing. Gin forced her to smile one too many times, and now her smile is meaningless. Ever since she's met Gin, Ai has just accepted the habit of smiling whenever the cold, ruthless, slightly insane, but extremely possessive Gin was around. Now that he was gone, what more reasons were there for her to smile?

That was reason number one for a reason not to smile.

Akemi was gone. Her parents were gone. Gin was gone. She was forever indebted to Conan. An entire underground syndicate was out searching for her. Fear and paranoia were the two main things that ruled her mind. She wasn't even sure if the Black Organization cared if their agents brought her back dead or alive anymore. Ai couldn't even walk around a corner without thinking that it would be the very last step she ever took. Heck, even the thought of voluntarily stepping outside of her-no, Professor Agasa's house was frightening.

That was reason number two for a reason not to smile.

She was all alone, and only Conan's promise of protecting her kept Ai sane, kept her from trying to take her own life away again. The boy detective wouldn't know it, but those very words he said to Ai when he tried to reassure her would keep Ai from suicide. When she would stand in Professor Agasa's kitchen holding a knife, his words would keep that blade from slitting her.

She'd never admit it, but when night overtook the day as she lay in bed, those words would give her the strength and determination to keep searching for the cure, to keep failing but never giving up, to wake up and face a new day Ai knew she didn't deserve to live.

But even his words…weren't enough for a smile.

Promises were meant to be broken.

Especially those made in haste.

One day when it came down to the choice of saving either Ai or Ran in a life or death situation, she would know how much Conan valued that promise of his. Ai was sure of it. After all, which would he rather choose: his happy old life, or the one who took that happy life of his and flipped it upside down, tearing his chance of ever having a normal life?

That was reason number three for a reason not to smile.

Regardless, Ai wanted to keep her mind in the present. She wanted to keep that forbidden security she didn't deserve. It was selfish. Ai knew that. But she wanted it. She wanted it more than anything in the entire universe. To know that someone would always be there for her, to know that person would never let her fall, to know that someone would offer her comforting embraces even when she'd deny it, to know that someone would accept her despite her ugly and scarred faults, Ai, Shiho, and even Sherry wanted these things more than anything. Ai with her new life **wanted** it. She **needed** it. But she would never have it. False hope was all she could cling to.

That was reason number four for a reason not to smile.


	3. First Was the Dark, Now the Cold

Ai was irritated. No, she was beyond irritated.

Scratch that. She was extremely pissed off.

If Conan came walking through that door right now, she'd probably stomp up to him with a furious aura surrounding her and shove the prototype version of the antidote down his throat. At this very moment, she could care less if she 'accidentally' grabbed the Apotoxin instead.

Conan was late.

Deathly late.

Three hours, eleven minutes, fifty-five seconds and counting late.

The strawberry blonde haired scientist allowed herself to sink farther into the couch, sulking. Her book had been long since tossed aside, and she hadn't been able to finalize the antidote, so Ai resorted to glaring at the door. _"I should bash that inconsiderate idiot over the head a few times with every encyclopedia volume I can find." _She thought crossly. _"He has the nerve to complain about the antidote not finishing quickly enough but isn't even willing to help!"_

She jumped from her spot and started pacing for what seemed to be the eleventh time. Her thoughts were hasty and erratic, randomly switching from one idea to another. Her mind hadn't been in such a state of chaos since…well, _that_.

Frustration seeped into her eyes, but she willed them away. Forget about Kudo. She told herself. There was dinner to make.

Meanwhile, Professor Agasa was locked safely away in his study. He could hear the abnormally loud sounds of a knife being brought down on whatever happened to be dinner that night. Usually, Professor Agasa would go out and help Ai with the cooking, but from what he had a glimpse of; he thought it best to stay where he was. Now, back to thinking about what he forgot to tell Ai-kun…

The little scientist, who now knew how to ride a bike and cook, was gently stirring her miso soup with a wooden ladle in her hands, at the same time, watching the beef in another corner of the stove sizzle in a little cooking oil. She then switched her attention from the soup to concentrate on preparing the beef. With a pair of chopsticks in hand, the determined girl set out to do just that. The rice cooker sat on the counter to the side, daintily blowing out steam.

Within ten minutes, she had the table all set and ready to eat. Ai sat alone at the table with a dismal air surrounding her. She picked at her food, not really in the mood to eat. She had called Professor Agasa down, but he claimed to be too busy with the project he had been obsessing over these past few days to come down at the moment.

She stared at her food, occasionally stabbing her share of beef with her chopsticks. Ai felt strangely restless, but why? She looked down her slowly cooling dinner. She lost her appetite. Actually, she never had it to begin with. Sighing, she slid down from her chair and shuffled back into her room, abandoning her meal. She really wasn't acting like herself. Showering and going to bed early were the only things she wanted right now. She just couldn't stay still or concentrate…it felt so hot. Maybe they should have the ventilation system examined just to be sure it was in working condition. Professor Agasa never did have his house maintained properly.

Maybe it was premonition hinting at some shrouded foreboding danger. Perhaps her intuition was trying to tell her something. She pushed it away. Ai didn't believe in a sixth sense. She hated it far too much to. Irony's a pain in the neck.

Morning came and that meant the sun was up and shining for all its worth. Ai was extremely grateful for it being a Saturday; otherwise she wouldn't have known how to withstand the absolutely insane amount of sunlight the whole day.

The moment she had opened her door, sunlight had brutally attacked her ice blue eyes and nearly blinded her. Groggily, she muttered something incoherent and slammed the door shut, making a hasty retreat back into her dark room. She flicked on the light and immediately winced from the fluorescent lights. Even the light from that was abnormally unbearable. Ai hesitantly cracked one eye open and made her way to a lamp, turning it on. Her poor abused eye which was taking in an absurdly excessive amount of light protested at its mistreatment. It started to burn and blinking didn't help at all. She stumbled her way back to the light switch and turned them off.

Relief flooded her senses at the dimly lit room. Satisfied with the adjustments, she crawled back into her bed, the only place she'd feel completely comfortable at right now. Just as her head hit the pillow, she sneezed. Miserably, she looked around and somewhere in the back of her mind, Ai dully registered that the room was devoid of tissue. She'd have to venture out into the cruel, bright, and burning sunlight to retrieve a box of Kleenexes.

She moaned pitifully, realizing what had to be done. Grabbing her pillow, she held it in front of her face like a shield then braced herself, opening the door. Unforgiving sunlight rushed in and filled every dark corner of her room without remorse. Ai clenched her eyes shut behind what little shade her pillow offered and bravely made her way outside. Light seemed to be shining from every angle to her.

Poor Ai shuffled around blindly, not daring to look from fear of the sun. Her sensitive eyes were starting to burn even from behind her closed eyelids. It wasn't until long that she stumbled straight into a wall.

A muffed, "Oof," escaped her mouth when her head slammed into her pillow against the wall like an air bag. She backed up a few steps then turned to the right mechanically, not even bothering to look. The tissue was near. She could sense it. It had to be. Otherwise, she'd collapse onto the floor from exhaustion and bake in the sunlight. Never had she shared such sympathy for the fictional vampires.

After two blown noses, three additional collisions, and the successful yet agonizing liberation of the tissue box from the living room, Ai retreated into her room, the place where there were no windows for sunlight to seep through. The miserable feeling girl flopped back into bed, which was actually a bad decision, seeing as a headache had started up.

Wanting to do nothing but crawl under the covers and fall asleep, Ai set out to do just that. Seconds later when she had felt somewhat comfortable, the blasted phone rang. She loved phones for all they were worth, but right now she felt like pouring some highly acidic solution over every single one of them in the house. She'd take pleasure in watching their plastic cases melt away, the wires and everything inside frying with short bursts of crackling electricity.

But…she did not want to get out of bed _again_. Ai tried to muffle out the shrill ringing that wrecked havoc on her headache but to no avail.

It was there.

It was annoying.

It was torturous.

And it had to stop.

Now.

Ai stormed out of bed and up to the phone that she imagined to shrink in fear. With a murderous aura, she glared at it wanting to rip apart its plastic casing. Whoever was on the line calling at such an unorthodox time such as now was really going to experience Ai's full throttle wave of pent up agitation. Clearing her throat, she picked up the receiver and not-so-cheerfully-greeted the person with a strained icy voice. "**Good** _morning_."

"Hey, good morning, Haibara. I hope this didn't wake you up too early from your beauty sleep." The voice on the other end snickered.

"_Kudo."_

"Not. At. All." She gritted out. Oh, the things Ai would do when she'd get her hands around him, his neck in particular. She could imagine him wearing his usual outfit with the stupid, big, square, glasses he wore in a feeble attempt to hide his true identity. His black hair would be ever so neatly made and then he'd have this insufferable grin stuck on his face that she would find –not that she'd ever admit it- so endearing.

The young detective cleared his throat trying to cure himself of the dryness in his mouth. He knew Ai was at the very least disappointed, but he couldn't help it. Ran would get suspicious if he went out so often. "Sorry about yesterday." That was the only thing he could do, apologize. "There was a homicide that turned up unexpectedly." He confessed sheepishly. He was about to continue when Ai interrupted him.

"Kudo, don't call me, talk to me, or even speak to me." She hissed out at him in a vexed tone. At the moment, Ai didn't even realize calling, talking, and speaking were the same things. Her headache was clouding her thoughts and she was desperate for some shut-eye.

"Are you feeling well, Haibara…?" He ventured carefully.

"You're the detective." She grumbled then hung up, ending their short conversation. Her temper all but diminished. It was too much trouble to get angry right now. Wearily, she shuffled to the tissue box, blew her nose once more, and then returned to her bed. Sweet bliss. She sighed. Now if only she could do something about that congested nose of hers.

Perhaps she was overreacting, but Ai was nothing short of stressed out and feeling absolutely miserable. There was only one thing she despised more than the Black Organization. Yeah, that's right.

She hated the common cold down to the very last nanometer in her being.

Well, hated was probably too mild a word to describe it. She was a complete mess when she had colds. Ai grew increasingly scatter-brained during one, almost enough to rival Professor Agasa. Her sense of balance was thrown off so she tripped more often. Her ears and eyes became extremely sensitive. Her nose was clogged and it felt like her heartbeat was in her head which didn't help the reoccurring headaches she had. It was like all cranial functions had slowed to an unimaginable speed, her gigantic vocabulary suddenly eluding her.

It was one of the few times that Ai acted the age she appeared to be. And, oh, how she loathed it. If anything, Ai was so independent to the point of aversion for people doing things for her. Kind gestures she could deal with. But having someone take care of her? Ai would've enjoyed that as much as eating slugs.

She couldn't stand the thought of depending on someone. It'd be like what little freedom she had snatched away and having to be restricted to her bed a majority of the time. Ai felt helpless when she stayed in bed in the mornings. Someone, anyone, could charge through her door at any given time and take her life. All it took were a few holes and loss of blood. Or maybe suffocation. Perhaps the person would try to smother her with her own pillow. Maybe gag her with wire.

Either way, Ai didn't like it. She didn't like the fact that Conan would be inspecting her dead body if she was ever murdered. It'd be too embarrassing. Well, if she was dead, it would matter but…work with her, people. Ai has a cold and it's warping her logic.

Ai groaned as she sneezed yet again. She wearily shuffled towards the tissue and blew her nose. Fed up with all the trips back and forth she had just noticed herself taking, Ai dragged the waste basket to the edge of her bed then placed the tissue box beside her on the bed.

Her mouth screamed for water, but her mind demanded sleep. Ai wanted nothing more than a sniper putting her out of her misery. Too bad there were no windows here.

An hour or so later, the professor remembered what he wanted to ask Ai from last night. He opened the door and asked if she wanted a flu shot since the influenza season was quickly approaching. The grumpy Ai had her eyes narrowed into slits as she sneezed and blew her nose. Professor Agasa said no more and went to retrieve a glass of water for her.

Ai sat up against her pillow, sighing. She hadn't meant to come off as rude but…her thoughts and emotions felt as if they were strapped to bungee cords and chucked off the side of Tokyo Tower. First she was afraid of being vulnerable to attacks then she wanted to be attacked. Still, it was no excuse for the way she had been acting. Ai was going to apologize.

Right after she blew her nose.

There were some reasons for her bleak mood. For one thing, a couple of gangsters had been hanging around Beika Street for a while, causing unease wherever they stayed. The people didn't exactly cause trouble 24/7, but they never did fail to torment others. At first Ai had been worried it was the Black Organization, her anxiety had been misplaced. She didn't bother worrying about them anymore. They were just a bunch of fools who thought breaking the law made them cool, that it gave them power. The police would come soon.

It was a shame how Ai paid them no heed any longer. Perhaps if she did, she could've prevented what happened next. Then again, no one could. But afterwards? Ai would wish that she could.

False hope among facts.

What a pity.


	4. Ai Be Immature

AN**: This shall be my long overdue note of thanks to everyone that's reviewed my story so far. xD I am so…I suppose the word for it could be, flattered, from all those compliments and praises you spoil me with. **

**You all are such nice people, always having something good to say, but in all honesty, I need someone picky. Someone so concerned with perfection that they would gladly single out each and every one of my mistakes and fling them back in my face, no sugar included. Yes, I'm serious. I hope you bunch of flamers are pyromaniacs. xD I still like you nice reviewers too. Yes, I do. x)**

**Updated: January 4, 2005 **

**Recent events regarding the tsunami have led me to believe I was indeed over-exaggerating more than necessary. Mankind, no matter how evil, greed-ridden, or cruel will never outrival the power of nature. I found it only right to change my chapter, regardless of it being fictional. I can only pray for the survivors and for as much help to be sent down there. I can't even begin to relate to the despair those people endure. **

**I've heard about the deaths on the news. I've heard my mom talking about it while we walked outside. But I have never actually understood how terrible it was until my Earth Science teacher told us about it. She told us about how families were ripped apart. How tourists hoping for a nice vacation are no more. How people died young or old. How relatives frantically dig through numerous pictures, because they buried the dead without identifying them first. The numbers are far too great. The best they could do was take a picture of the bodies and send the picture for others to search through. **

**Imagine flipping through hundreds of pictures of the dead for your loved ones, never knowing if the next one would be them.**

**There were rarely any happy endings.**

"I want her dead."

"I know you do."

Gin was livid. His eyes were smoldering with ice, so cold that you could get frostbite from them faster than you could in the Arctic Ocean. His murderous intentions were flowing off him like water, water containing jagged bits of ice that tore through you as if you were only one of those paper nets at the carnivals. His teeth, hidden behind tightly pressed lips, grated against each other so hard that he had had cut through the cigarette between them. The lit end lay flickering on the floor.

The long-haired man wanted nothing than the death of Shiho Miyano. He knew she was alive. It would've been impossible for her not to be. After she had disappeared from the gas chambers, the feeling of her annoying existence had been driving him past borderline. It all started slowly from the back of his mind.

At first it was just a random thought. Then it started growing to the point of him reminiscing about her, every time he walked past certain places. Every time he dismantled his gun to clean it, there she was, polluting his thoughts with the mere image of her. Gin could still feel her beside him in the firing range, emptying shots into her targets with precision aiming. He knew he was an addict. No, not just to his cigarette.

He was addicted to Sherry.

And killing was his anti-drug.

Yes, for a few fleeting seconds as Gin would pull the trigger with the barrel up to the victim's temple, his obsession with Sherry evaporated…like the steam from his gun. All of it was gone. Just like his target's life. Then as he admired how the head would snap back, the body crashing lifelessly against the floor, and the dull red water of life seep out of the carcass, reminding him of Sherry. How those victims should've been her. He was reminded of how that bottle never broke. How it never was able to stain his carpet.

A shame, really. He thought it would've been a beautiful sight. She should've died in the snow that night. Gin had his camera with him that day.

Gin flexed his left hand. Yes, he truly believed that Sherry's death would be the end of his addiction. But he couldn't rid his addiction without permission which is why we're here now with Gin in Vermouth's office. Vermouth was being her normal difficult self, enjoying herself while Gin tipped over borderline. If only she knew what degrading words were running through her subordinate's head…then again, she probably did.

Vermouth smiled at him. A cold patronizing smile he knew that meant she regarded him no higher than a slug, but nonetheless, it was a smile. "I will not allow you to harm her." Her voice was calm. In the midst of all the fury Gin was flinging around like a storm, her words were firm and clear, unwavering. "Gin, _dear_, I have spoiled you far too much." She drawled out. Vermouth made the word _dear_ sound synonymous to _bastard_. Oh, how clear the contempt was. She made no move to hide the malice in her voice. "You have given him far too many leads from your carelessness." They both knew who the _him_ was.

His frighteningly sharp ice blue eyes flashed as he fought to keep his composure. His foot was dragged furiously back and forth over his cigarette on the ground, snuffing the light out. It suddenly seemed darker as if the cigarette butt was one of their light sources.

It was useless now. When she would start with his usefulness to the organization, there was no use arguing with her. He wasn't as desperate as to drop to his knees and beg. Gin would find another way. In the meantime, he would accompany Vodka on a mission…a certain associate of the organization was in need of some long overdue persuasion.

He pivoted briskly on his heel then strode out. His stiff posture conveyed a minuscule allusion of submission. He would obey her orders…for now.

No one, absolutely **no one** had pure intentions in the Black Organization. Sure, there may have been the occasional agent that was only doing it for the money to pay for a family member's surgery, but it was all blood money. It was filthy, disgusting, vile, illegal money. In the entire history of the Black Organization, there had never been one legal monetary donation. Every little good cause was blotted out with **black**.

Take for instance, Ai. Her current name, Ai Haibara, was just a pseudonym. Shiho Miyano is her real name, codename: Sherry. Shiho is a good person, emotionless, but nonetheless good. She worked for the syndicate only to protect one life, her sister's, Akemi. But at the cost of what? Eighteen deaths? Shiho held her end of the agreement. She created the APTX-4869. Her sister was still killed. Eighteen deaths and Shiho gained nothing from it. The leaders of the Black Organization were ruthless. Lies, deceit, secret agendas, all of them were instinctive to them.

It was repulsive, but there was a certain beauty to it. A beauty you couldn't help but admire. Power and corruption were just a few of those enticing elements you couldn't help but stare in awe at. And the Black Organization had that power. They held and controlled that power, raising it to an art form. While the 'Sleeping Kogoro' had risen to fame with the media, the Blacks had spread throughout the entire Underground community. They were everywhere and anywhere, controlling cooperate businesses, drug deals, power plants, UPS, airports, charity events, museum trades, assassinations, everything! Africa, Americas, Antarctica, Asia, Australia, Europe, you name it, they were there. It was a friggen worldwide corruption in the making.

Hell, the Black Organization now controlled 3/5's of the world's economy. They could go for world domination if they wanted to. The syndicate practically held the stock market as a hostage.

Of the Seven Deadly Sins, Greed was the most prominent. Yes…it was Greed, and then came Gluttony. Gluttony was the cause of Envy, and where Envy was, you could be sure to find Lust, Anger, and Pride following it. Sloth was barely noticed. Perhaps this was one the only redeeming traits of the organization. Everyone did their part, and if you weren't able to…well, we all know what happens then. They weren't lazy. No, they tied up each and every loose end. Everything was carefully planned and executed. All of their resources were used to further their cause.

Everyone worked together, yet they were all strangers. Everyone worked, yet no one trusted. You couldn't afford to trust anyone. If you did, the moment that first opportunity came, they'd shove a knife through you, introducing you to your last breath. A stab to the front or back, it didn't matter to them.

See why Ai was afraid of them? She was a wise person. It was wise to fear the powerful. Only fools would turn a blind eye.

Gin watched eyed the scene with slight disgust, a freshly lit cigarette caught in the sneer occupying his lips. Vodka was busy rearranging Shinji Akira's face and internal organs. The man had started to cough up blood long ago. A sickening _snap_ was heard as Vodka had smashed in the man's face; the person's head snapped back, his body following him, flying into a wall. He fell to the floor with as much grace as a man half beaten to death could muster. The guy wasn't granted the mercy of unconsciousness just yet. Vodka stepped back and allowed his partner to do the honors.

Gin, with his hat tipped forward and covering one of his eyes, approached the bloody man. His steps were slow and deliberate, each dull knock of wood inspiring a new level of fear in the man. He was emotionless as he pulled out his pistol already equipped with a silencer and whipped it in place against the man's temple. No words were exchanged.

_Bang._

Then the world swirled into oblivion.

Ai awoke, her body covered with chills. She found it hard to move, so she settled for staring at her wall while she tried to control her heartbeat that seemed to be slamming against her ribcage. Her eyes started to dart around apprehensively as if expecting someone stepping into her view. _"Sleep paralysis…"_ That was the answer her mind came up with for her immobility. Granted, it was a delayed thought but…it least assured her that she was just asleep. Suddenly, Ai's heart lurched up so fast, she felt like barfing it up when she heard the door being knocked on.

She thought for sure her life had been cut by three years. She took several calming breaths, reassuring herself that it was perfectly safe. She shuffled towards the door, hesitantly unlocking it open. The door burst open, seemingly of its own accord without warning, sending Ai stumbling backwards. There under the doorframe stood Conan grinning with a canteen gripped in his hands, the sound of liquid sloshing inside.

Ai blinked at him for a few seconds then turned around, grumbling something incomprehensible –most likely unpleasant- and crawled back into bed when she realized there wasn't any immediate danger. She sighed contentedly when her head hit the pillow.

She peeked out one eye when she felt a presence looming over her, only to come face to face with Conan as he peered curiously at her. It took a while for her mind to register the distance between their faces. Her ice blue eyes regained a bit of their shine as they widened in shock. She scrambled back, embarrassed for unknown reasons, only to remember at the last second that her bed wasn't all that big. She toppled over the edge, landing with a _thump_. Ai was slumped upside down against her bed and the floor, her legs in the air, shoulders on the floor, and a disgruntled expression on her face. She sneezed, and her legs fell over, flopping to either side of her head.

"Ai!" Conan hurried over to her. "You didn't hurt anything, did you?"

The girl in question rolled over to get up, rubbing the back of her head. "No," she glared pointedly at Conan, "not yet."

A sweatdrop rolled down the back of his head. Conan knew he was suddenly treading on paper thin ice. "_Hmm…how do you pacify a girl?"_ He remembered something…it was there on the edge of his memory…yes! That's it, compliment her. It always worked for Ran. But what should he praise Ai about? The word clothes popped into his mind. "_Right, now that should be easy enough…she's wearing pajamas. What can I say about them? Uh…better make it quick, she doesn't look all too patient."_

Ai was reaching for the tissue box, ready to bludgeon the detective to kingdom come with it. The memory of leaving her hanging for more than three hours without any notice was still fresh in her mind. So was the fact he had poured paint all over her. Oh, how she wished looks could kill.

The thought might have been a little more than slightly foolish, but she had a cold. And since she had a cold, Ai felt pretty darn miserable, and heaven help any who would dare defy her. Right now, she wasn't concerned with what people would think of her. By God, if she wanted to be immature and daydream, she would! If being sick was going to portray her as being more childish than ever, then she would exploit it! She could always blame it on her cold. One didn't get sick everyday, and Ai needed to vent.

"Eh, Ai, you look cute-like a girl." Conan blurted out but feeling utterly **mortified** half a second later.

The homicidal girl paused in mid-reach for the box and frowned at him. "Excuse me?"

It was true though. Ai did look cute in her pajamas. They were loose pants and button up long sleeves, decorated with pictures of what seemed to be random newspaper articles everywhere. The cuffs on the sleeves were a bit too big, ending an inch or two below her fingers. Every time she moved her hands, the sleeves would flop around comically. At times, Conan was almost tempted to laugh when it made her look adorable –not that he'd ever say that out loud- , but he wasn't quite ready to be lowered six feet under or cremated for that matter.

"Ah, no! Not that I meant you didn't _normally_ look like a girl." He stuttered when she looked slightly offended. He tried to strengthen his story. "I mean that you look more like a girl in your pajamas!" Conan finished weakly. There goes Casanova Conan…he's just a natural smooth-talker around her.

Ai gave him her trademark deadpanned stare, crossing her arms. Her cold was causing her temper to be merciless. "That amounts to the same thing, _moron_."

"Umm…uh…" Conan was at a loss for words. This was awkward. Why couldn't he just keep his mouth shut? He hurriedly changed the subject before he was kicked out of the frying pan. "I brought some chicken soup from Ran!" He chuckled nervously, holding out the canteen in his hands, offering it as a sort of peace treaty. "She heard you were from America and thought you'd like it, since you were sick and all…"

"Oh, _really_?" She asked testily. "I suppose you want me to drink it now too, right?" Ai sneezed again and she tiredly clambered over to the tissue box.

"Well, Ran said-"

Ai cut him off. "Right, Ran said so and whatever she says is good for me. Is that what you were trying to say?" She snapped irritably.

She didn't give him a chance to answer. Ai took the canteen from him and walked out, fighting against her newfound enemy, the blinding sun, to reach the kitchen. Conan trailed a few steps behind her just in case she snapped and decided to brandish a phonebook, knife, or something to that extent.

Phonebook, you echo? Yes, even a phonebook can be lethal. What are you looking at me for? He's the homicide detective.

Conan's few steps behind had turned into quite a few many. Fortunately for him, Professor Agasa's house was like his second home ever since he was…er, his age, so he didn't have to worry about getting lost. But, that meant he lost sight of her. He lost sight of a **sick** Ai might I add. You should **never** lose sight of a sick Ai Haibara.

Obnoxious sounds of crashing and banging metal sounded throughout the house, practically clawing at your ears for attention. It certainly captured Conan's. He ran to the kitchen, the place most likely to have falling pieces of metal in the house.

He was right.

There, in the midst of the clutter, was Ai clutching at her head with pots and pans strewn about her. He literally felt someone drawing a violin bow over his heartstrings. They vibrated like crazy, a deep reverberating resonance. What was this feeling? Conan ignored the mess and made a beeline for Ai who was mostly likely hurt if she was cradling her head like that. He kneeled down beside her and gently removed her hands.

For the first time that day, Ai didn't resist him. She wasn't insisting on taking care of it on her own, and she didn't have any sarcastic or spiteful comment to throw at him either. Ai didn't even reach for anything to chuck at him. She just sat there, allowing Conan to inspect her injury, biting her lip when his hand came close to brushing over the forming bruise. She let out an uncharacteristic whimper when his palm finally settled onto the spot on her head.

Where had that stubborn and independent spirit of hers gone to?

Surprised, Conan pulled back, studying her. She sat with her knees tucked under her, probably because a pot or something fell on her head causing Ai to lose her balance. Her knuckles gripped the tops of the knees to the point of turning white. Her shoulders were slumped yet rigid, and her head was tilted downwards, but he could see her eyes clenched shut, and she was biting her lower lip.

The boy frowned. Something was definitely wrong. He retrieved some ice, stored them in a plastic zip-lock bag, wrapped it in a paper towel, and lightly pressed it to her head. Ai winced from the sudden contact and initially tried to pull away, but instead, kept herself still.

He opened his mouth to ask, but Ai beat him to the question. "I opened the wrong cabinet." She explained softly. It was an unexpected but welcome change from her previous anger, but Conan said nothing, just giving her a lop-sided smile and helped her maneuver through the scattered kitchenware to a chair.

After making sure she was hurt no where else, Conan turned to pick up the mess and stored them back in their cabinets, safely this time. He righted the tipped over stool and started. Ai soundlessly watched him through her bangs as he reorganized the kitchenware without complaints. As he finished, their eyes met, and Ai communicated her silent thanks before breaking the contact, disguising it as a sneeze. She found the walls fascinating.

It didn't take a genius to know that Ai was a hard person to approach, much less talk to. Days would go by and Conan would think he had Ai figured out, and then she goes and does something to prove him wrong. She was one of the hardest people to understand, if not _the_ hardest.

Whenever he pealed away one false layer, thinking he had reached her, another wall would materialize him front of him, stopping him in his tracks. All his efforts would be rewarded with another obstacle. It might've seemed vain to break through one wall only to meet more of her inner defenses, but Conan knew he didn't keep trying, soon those walls would pile up, and Ai would be impossible to reach. Conan was determined to never let that happen to anyone.

The boy placed the unopened canteen on the counter then dragged up a chair next to hers and climbed on top of it to see how big the bump on her head really was. Ai was truly surprised. It was a rare moment when Conan was so openly concerned about her. She knew that he did care, but it wasn't very often that he showed it.

Was she flattered? Yes.

Was she annoyed? Yes. But only because he called her klutzy.

Was she enjoying the attention? Yes.

Yes, she was. Ai took in every last bit of attention that was offered no matter how much of a loner she was. Even if it was just Conan worried over a bump on her head, she felt truly cared for. Little gestures…those were her most treasured possessions. Ai didn't know it, but a sneaky little smile sneaked onto her lips, against her will.

And that's how a startled Agasa found the two that morning. A worried looking Conan fussing over her, and Ai fixating her eyes on the floor, a slight blush gracing her cheeks. To say Professor Agasa was shocked would be an understatement. He blinked a few times before settling on the conclusion he just sleepwalking and delusional. Wearily, he shuffled back to his room.


	5. She Figured It Out?

**Updated December 28, 2004**

**"Apartment--> Department?" -smacks self for not catching it- xD I'm such an idiot. I give much thanks to SN 1987A and Tant who caught the little things like this for me. **

A few days later, Ai had recovered enough so that she didn't have to blow her nose every two minutes. From her seat on the couch, Ai watched in mute boredom as Professor Agasa ran around trying to get his things ready. Just yesterday he received a rather lengthy long distance phone call from a fellow inventor in Germany. Apparently, Professor Agasa's immediate assistance was needed over there in this joint project they were working on. The professor was quite excited too.

The level of noise in the house was even worse than what you'd hear on New Year's.

"Professor, the time…" Ai stated to say. Before she knew it, he was out the door and stuffing his luggage into his car. She observed him through a window. The young chemist sighed. When was he ever going to remember that you can't board a plane without your passport? On top of that, he forgot his keys…his car keys no less.

Seeing as he was too busy frantically searching through his pockets for the above mentioned items, Ai went to retrieve them. The passport was behind the washing machine, and the keys were on top of the television. As usual.

When Professor Agasa rushed back to his house, he found Ai holding out his missing passport and keys expectantly. He gave her a sheepish smile, one that she was so used to seeing. "Good bye, Ai-kun." He said, ruffling her strawberry blonde hair fondly as a farewell like he was going to be away for a long time then rushed off.

Ai was never too fond of people touching her, but since he is her adoptive father, she let it slide. Inwardly, she wondered if the professor remembered the traffic lights placed right around that corner…Ai jumped at the sound of screeching tires then a sweatdrop rolled down the back of her head. Guess not.

She shut the door then quickly returned to the couch, stuck her hand behind a pillow, and pulled out a letter. Months ago, Professor Agasa had given her permission to open and read his letters for him. At the time, Ai shrugged and thought nothing of it, thinking it was Professor Agasa's way of telling her he accepted her as a member of his family.

Now, her fingers played nervously with the edges of the envelope. It wasn't anything fancy, just a plain creamy white color front and back except for this red wax seal she thought looked familiar. She had already opened the letter early in the morning before the professor had woken, because she found it strange there wasn't an address written on it. No return address either, meaning someone had deliberately placed this in the professor's mailbox.

The contents inside were fairly simple. One sheet of paper, the words were typed out most likely by computer. It had one neat short paragraph, containing a threat or warning, if you prefer that.

Throughout the day, Ai debated with herself if she should tell him about the letter or not. It seemed like just a simple prank played by bored people. Should she really give it to him and ruin his happy mood? As far as she knew, the professor didn't have any enemies, so perhaps it was a prank.

Or maybe it wasn't.

She finally decided not to bother with it, hiding the envelope away. Both Conan and Professor Agasa had remarked once or twice that she was too paranoid. Ai argued that she was just trying to be careful in her defense. Right now, she started to see why they thought that.

She wasn't going to bother. Nope, not at all. But then why did the envelope feel like it was super-glued to her fingers right now?

Ai muttered something indecipherable – it was becoming a bad habit – and willed herself to dump the letter into the trash by prying it from her own fingers. But then her eyes flickered back to the waste basket. Ai frowned, being irritated with her own intermittent behavior. Never was she this indecisive. '_Okay, mind over matter.' _She told herself. Ai was going to ignore the nagging sensation.

She went to make a slice of toast and started to read a random science article in the magazine on the counter while waiting. Ai found herself reading the same two lines over and over. Eventually she gave up on reading and settled for watching the red-hot coils inside the toaster glow.

Yeah, you'd think that Ai of all people wouldn't be caught dead doing this, huh? Well, news flash, she's human too.

The phone rang, and Ai was glad for the distraction. She sorely needed something to take her mind off the letter. She thankfully hurried from the kitchen to pick up the ringing contraption she had called cursed only a few days ago. "Haibara speaking." She was thankful, but as usual she kept everything hidden in her monotone voice.

"A…Ai-kun…?" Spoke a timid voice into the phone. It took a few seconds, but she recognized it as Ayumi's. Curious to what the girl had to say, Ai stayed silent. "Do you think you could come over? Now?" Ayumi added.

"Why?"

Ai inwardly grimaced from the silence on the other end. She didn't mean for that to come out so…scathingly.

She heard Ayumi take a deep breath and say, "Because…" She began as if unsure she should tell Ai the real reason. "I wanna ask you something."

Ai felt slightly confused. What was so important that she had to go over for? "Can't you ask over the phone?"

She heard Ayumi promptly burst into tears and loud wails. Her eyes widened from surprise, so shocked that she temporarily lost the ability to speak. "So it **is** true!" Ai heard her cry into the phone. "You really don't like being around us!"

Ai gathered herself and racked her mind for something comforting to say. What did she have? Nothing but a few dusty bits and pieces seeing as she never had the need to comfort someone. Ai didn't trust herself to speak for a few seconds while Ayumi spouted angry accusations at her. The miniature chemist had to hold the phone away from her ear to give it some relief while she thought of something to say.

Comforting Ayumi was usually Kudo's department, not hers. She tried to think of something Akemi would say to her when they were younger, but Ai wasn't Akemi, she was…Ai…or Shiho…or Sherry. Take your pick. She was all three, and none of them knew what to say.

Her mouth opened and closed, trying to verbalize the feeble excuses formed in her head, but no sound came out. Finally, she did the only other thing she could think of. "Yoshida-san, please, stop. I'll go." Ai managed to force out.

"Really?" The voice suddenly turned bright and chipper. "I'll tell my mom to make extra for dinner!" She chirped happily. "I'll see you soon!"

Ai heard the phone clatter, silence, and then a dial tone. She blinked incredulously at what had transpired. The girl, who was mentally older than Ayumi by ten years, had just fallen for the other's trap. Hook, line, and sinker. Ai had just been suckered into not only going over to Ayumi's house, but also staying for dinner!

She shook her head in silent wonder.

It wasn't long until Ai had been introduced to Ayumi's mother before she was dragged upstairs into the girl's room for the very first time. It was…different from what Ai had pictured. Instead of having walls of bright neon pink and shelves and shelves of plush animals, it was just different.

The walls were painted in a soft yet dark blue color, small white stars everywhere in eighty-eight constellations. Ai was able to identify a few of them from the time she spent under the night sky star-gazing. There was a drawer on one side of the room with plushies piled into a neatly made pyramid, and one on the other side was a chair and desk stacked with books and a computer. Ayumi's bed was placed in between the two, the covers a beautiful golden-orange. The curtains for her window, on the other hand, were blue just like the walls, and if you pulled them shut, the picture on them would form a white crescent moon.

Ayumi smiled at Ai. "Do you like it?" She asked softly, shuffling her small feet into the carpet. "The stars even glow when you turn the lights off."

"It's beautiful." Ai answered her truthfully. "Really not what I had expected." When she frowned, Ai inwardly panicked, wondering if she said something wrong. Maybe the last comment was a bit too much…

"That's what Genta-kun and Mitsuhiko-kun said!" Ayumi finished with a pout. Then she reconsidered that. "Well…not exactly what they said, but almost the same thing." She looked at the impassive girl with hurt shining in her eyes. "Is my room really that strange?"

Now that they were face-to-face, Ai found it even harder to come up with the right words. Her normal ambiguous answers didn't seem to fit here. She wanted to say something, and yet she also didn't want to unintentionally offend her. Is this what people felt like around her? It was then that Ai suddenly realized she knew pretty much nothing about her friend. If her **room** surprised her, what's to say nothing else would?

She wanted to say something like, "It's only strange if you think it is, Yoshida-san." But she didn't. The words just didn't feel appropriate. In fact, it felt more like when her mouth tried to say it, someone would stuff cork down her throat to prevent air from escaping to form the words.

It was more awkward and humiliating than anything. "I think it's very pretty." Was all she came up with. "Did you select the design yourself?"

Ayumi nodded, beaming from Ai's simple praise like it meant the world to her. "Yup. Mom, Dad, and I painted all this!" She giggled. "Don't tell anyone, but I messed up on a few stars. Dad even put a few constellations in the wrong place, but Mom said no one would notice." She whispered with a sly grin. "I helped Mom with the curtains too!" Ayumi finished proudly.

Ai could only nod her head silently, not knowing if she was supposed to smile and say something in return.

"C'mon, let's play with my dolls or something if you're bored."

Oh, the dreaded sentence.

Ai knew that Auymi would say that sooner or later, and Ai was already thinking of ways to escape the activity even before the first time the girl asked her to come over to her house to play. What **was** she supposed to say? Ai didn't want to hurt her feelings.

"I don't know how to play dolls."

Eh…that didn't sound right.

"I don't want to play dolls."

Then what else would they do? Sit there?

"Let's read your books instead."

Try again Ai…

"Umm…"

Soon, the two were re-enacting the movie Godzilla. Well, more like Ayumi was, and Ai was pointlessly waving a fairy around. Ayumi had pulled out some old blocks from under her bed and stacked them on top of each other in different orders pretending them to be buildings. They were soon knocked over by a Godzilla doll only to be re-built then knocked over again.

Ai felt quite simply stupid as she waved her fairy around in the air. She was concentrating so hard on not allowing it to show that she didn't notice Ayumi steadily growing quiet. "Ai?"

The girl in question put the object of her humiliation down and looked at Ayumi. "Yes?"

"You don't like this much, do you?"

'_Am I that transparent?_' She asked herself rhetorically. But instead, she said, "It's fine."

"No!" Ayumi suddenly burst out. "I don't mean **this**. I mean putting yourself at our level." She explained, staring straight at Ai with an unwavering gaze. "You're so smart…you're so grown-up. You don't even have to act like it. It's like you have to act like a child instead. Why are you still here? Shouldn't you be at some special school?"

For a moment, all that was heard was silence.

"Is this what you wanted to ask me?"

"Yeah."

"I see."

"Do you? Do you really, Ai?" Ayumi was serious. She even dropped the formalities. "I'm not saying it's a bad thing to be different and so smart but…it's strange." The girl released a sigh. "Ever since I met you, Ai, it's like you've never acted your age. Sure, you follow us and play with us, but it always feels like we're playing with adults. You and Conan."

Ai shifted uncomfortably at hearing these words.

"The two of you know things that kids our age shouldn't." Ayumi continued. "I asked Mom about it, and she said that people like you and Conan were called geniuses or prodigies…but, I know that's not true Ai.

"I've seen how Conan never gets scared when he's sees dead people. Kids like us would've run off screaming. He even touches them without looking away. Conan always knows exactly what he's talking about too! No one can do that just because they're smart! Things like that come when you've been doing it for a long time.

"And Conan said that his parents lived in America so he stays with the Mouris. He's only been there for a year too. You can't learn everything from books, Ai. No matter how old you are. Books can explain things to you, but they can't teach you how to act when someone's dying. They can't teach you how to check how long someone's been dead. Nobody can do those things the first time and get it right."

"I'm afraid those are questions you'll have to ask Conan-kun." Ai interrupted.

Ayumi made a face. "Fine. Then I'll ask questions about you."

"You should respect other's privacy."

"And you shouldn't keep secrets from your friends!" Ayumi countered, too caught up in her emotions to mellow out. "This isn't because I'm jealous that Conan knows you better than me and would talk to you more, Ai! Remember that crush I told you I had on him?"

"Had?" Ai questioned skeptically.

"Yeah." Ayumi nodded. "I thought it was a crush, but it wasn't. Do you know why?" She plowed on, not giving Ai a chance to answer. "It's because I felt the same for you. That's when I knew it wasn't a crush. It was just because I wanted to know more about him. I wanted to know why, know how he does the things he can." She confessed. "It was the same with you when you came, Ai. I wanted to find out more about you two. Both of you act so different than us. We always wonder, and sometimes we just tell each other it's because you two are smart, but it's hard to believe sometimes."

"Yeah, us. Like Genta-kun, Mitsuhiko-kun, and me." She clarified when she saw Ai raise an eyebrow at the word "we".

"At school, both of you always get perfect scores. The only time Conan didn't was when he fell asleep during the history test. Mitsuhiko-kun and Genta-kun always complain to me about how smart you two are.

"And it's not just at school, it's outside too. Sometimes, you act so afraid of something. Things that we can't see. It's like you're blaming yourself for something, and people are chasing you for what you did. Sort of like when Genta-kun stole some cookies from his mom's cookie jar and didn't tell her but more secretly." She frowned. "Don't look so surprised, Ai. We're young, not stupid. But it did take me awhile to figure out.

"I…I'm not mad at you, Ai. It's more like…disappointed. Yeah, that's the word. You know you can trust us with any of your secrets, even Genta-kun who looks like he'd tell anyone for some eel and rice. But he wouldn't. Friends are important to him too! We just want to know why you can't tell us. What's so important that you can't tell us, Ai? Mitsuhiko-kun's really sad because you don't trust him. He really likes you. You know that."

It was a really awkward note to end on, but Ayumi said what she needed to then stayed silent. Ai, on the other hand, was floored. She never imagined that any of these things, simple things, would be noticed. And yet, Ayumi just proved her wrong. Ai could try to deny it, say that she was wrong and in turn, hurt one of the only people she considered somewhat a friend.

She tried listening to her heart. She really did. But her heart was divided into three separate pieces!

Sherry said quite plainly that Ai had no need for friends. She should just deny everything and get over with it. It wasn't like she was going to die without friends.

Shiho thought pretty much the same thing. What good were friends when there were trained killers out to get you? Would she risk another life on the line by telling the truth to a little girl? It'd most likely be another life on her conscience, summing it up to nineteen deaths. It'd be her fault all over again. Memories with Akemi were all she needed. Don't tell her. It was just the most logical thing to do.

Ai, on the other hand, was the one with the friends, and she wasn't quite ready to give them up yet. Both Sherry and Shiho had never really experienced the feeling of having friends. Ai felt that Ayumi deserved to know if she figured it out by herself. But if she told her, would she be a hypocrite after telling Conan that he couldn't under any circumstance tell Ran?

She felt so confused and unsure.

AN**: This will be my present to everyone for Christmas. And no, it's not late. I just wanted you to read it on Boxing Day. The day you're supposed to open presents on. xD**


	6. From Blank to Fake

**Updated January 9, 2005**

"Would you like me to call Conan-kun then?" Ai offered. "You seem to be more interested in him." She had to think of something quick so used Conan as a scapegoat to bide time. She would apologize to him for it later.

Ayumi huffed and placed her hands on her hips. "I don't really care who goes first. I just want to know." It was an absurd thought, but she vaguely reminded Ai of a mother scolding a child.

She didn't know what possessed her to do it, but Ai muttered a, "Yes, ma'am…" Then shuffled out the door and went down the steps. Ai figured if she didn't care, Conan might as well go first. Maybe he could figure out someway to escape this mess. It wasn't too late…Maybe Professor Agasa had some brainwashing machine hidden in the depths of his house. Ai wouldn't exactly put it past him to invent something like that. Either way, she needed some time to think this out rationally. Nothing good ever came from hasty choices. It only worked for people with lucky streaks, and she didn't feel very lucky today.

She could feel Ayumi's gaze pressing up against her back. It was like being trapped behind a door with your back against the wall. Add in the pressure of the chance that she might lose something precious, and it felt like there was a serial killer in the room with you.

She wondered how Conan would react to this. Hesitantly, she picked up the receiver and dialed the number for the Mouri Detective Agency. It rang until the answering machine picked up. Ai hung up the phone then tried the number for the earring phone. A sudden change in sound signaled the start of the conversation.

Ai just looked so nervous. If one didn't know any better, she looked like she was calling Conan to ask him out or something. Wait…that's an even scarier thought. She took a relaxing breath then ventured out a, "Hello?"

For a few tense seconds, all Ayumi could hear was silence from Ai.

Did you want to know why Ai was so silent?

It's because Conan's response had her on the edge of panic.

Ai became so pale; you'd have thought she tripped into powdered chalk. Her fingers trembled so badly, she had to fight to keep the phone from slipping out of her grasp. Scared, terrified, frightened, afraid, fearful, petrified, panicked, she felt all these things magnified by three. It was fear, shock, and panic clouding her mind all over again.

The emotions flashed once but then they left her.

"I'll be there." She hung up the phone and turned to Ayumi. "I'm sorry, but there's something I have to do right now. I…have to go." Ai didn't think twice about running out the door but stopped in her tracks when she found Ayumi's mother re-arranging their shoes.

"Ai-kun!" She heard Ayumi cry out from behind her. "Don't you dare think you can run away!"

"Oh dear…" Began her mom. "Now did you two kids have a fight?"

Ai didn't bother answering while she slipped on her shoes hurriedly.

"Ai-kun won't tell me what wrong…Could ask her, Mom? Please?" Ayumi pleaded.

"I'm sorry, but I have to go." Ai repeated. In other words, _get the BLEEP out of my way!_ "This is an urgent matter, and I would appreciate it if you didn't pry." Did Ai's thoughts sound cranky and rude or what?

Ayumi's mother was surprised by her professional tone. You know…the one your boss would use when they weren't satisfied with your efforts, all the while conveying their thoughts in the most subtle and polite manner. Yeah, that one.

"Are you going home, Ai-kun? You'll get there faster by car." Ai considered this for a few seconds then nodded at the woman's unspoken request. Ayumi's mother put her shoes on then went off to fetch her keys.

"I'm going too." Ayumi stubbornly declared. She looked at her suspiciously. "Ai-kun, what are you hiding?"

A minute later, the three were piled into a car, speeding towards Professor Agasa's house.

Or…what remained of it at least…

It wasn't even a house anymore…it looked more like black charred…things sticking out of the ground. Smoke was still puffing out in small amounts. Ai watched firemen go in and out of the once-was-house.

She wanted to sink into denial. She wanted to so badly shout out in a dramatic, "NO!" of despair. She wanted to fall to her knees and sob bitterly, cursing the world for her misfortune. How had the house burnt down…? What happened here? Was it an accident or-

The simple threat in the form of a letter entered her mind.

Then she felt numb.

Like nothing could touch her.

Devoid of feelings.

But it wasn't on purpose this time.

Ai wanted so badly to feel the grief, to feel her own sorrow, to feel her hope crumble away into dust, only to be swept away by the winds, never to be collected again. She so sorely wished for her resolve to crumble. Why was she so involved with her antidote that it almost completely erased the world around her?

The lab was gone. She had come across 372 versions of the antidote, each day tweaking it here and there to perfect it, only to come across a new possibility. It was her life. Each time she dug farther, more questions emerged. Would this one cure it? Should I increase the strength? What should I put in this? If I administered this, would it somehow alter the chemicals?

It was like trying to stay afloat in an ocean with half her rowboat intact.

Now it was more like trying to swim across the Pacific with only a paddle.

The first home she ever had was gone. The place where she would sleep in at every night, indulging in the comfort it offered if only for a minute. It was her very first sanctuary, like it kept the troubling world away from her. It was a place she could always retreat to, a place where she was accepted for who she was.

The lab, the last samples of the APTX-4869, all the different antidotes she had created, her home, everything was gone. Now what did she have to work on? What she have to work from? The computer she stored all the files on most likely didn't make it out of the fire.

She wasn't even aware of Ayumi's mother trying to comfort her. Her mind never registered Ayumi muttering, "I'm right, aren't I?" Her eyes never got the visual up to her brain of Conan stepping out from the charred mess and running toward her.

All her life she was told that she was cool…cold…detached from the world.

That was exactly how she felt.

She felt cool…like when you played on the swings and the wind would rush against you. Then as you fell back, your heart was being sucked out from underneath you.

She felt cold…like those times at night when no matter how hard you curled up under your covers, you shivered like mad from the air.

She felt detached from the world…like how you would listen to your teacher babble on and on about something you could care less about, only to realize that your eyes were unfocused and your mind separated from your body.

Except Ai was doing none of these things. She was simply staring at the black mess while being encircled in the arms of Conan.

Wait.

How'd that happen?

"Ai, what happened to Professor Agasa?" He asked desperately for the third time. "His car isn't here. Where is he? Do you know?"

Ai napped out of her reverie when she remembered the professor. She found she had trouble standing on her trembling legs. "He's safe, Kudo…" She whispered. "A business trip to Germany, he left this morning." Conan's expression of relief matched hers.

Conan wasn't even aware of how tightly he was holding her. "I was so scared…" She heard him admit softly. "I thought you two were trapped in the fire. My mind went blank…I didn't know what to do." He pulled away showing Ai his ash covered face. That's when she noticed his clothes where also smeared with black. "The explosion, it was just massive…I could only stand aside watching others douse the flames." He shook his head slowly, distraught. "I thought for sure you two were gone."

"Kudo," That detective had such foolish self-righteousness. He probably would've blamed himself for not doing anything if she and the professor did indeed die. "How did the fire start?" She took the opportunity to collect her scattered and raging thoughts to sedate them with preferably more than just a pound of mental tranquilizers. She broke away from his grip and stepped back.

"F-from with I gathered, the kitchen, or where it used to be, was where most of the damage occurred. Of course, I could be wrong since the second floor collapsed." The two residents of the house were safe, so his mind resumed its normal proficient manner. "The air around smells faintly of gasoline…one of the conclusions I reached was that something was rigged in the house to cause a timed explosion, giving the culprit with sufficient time to run to safety." He straightened his glasses. "A bomb seems too unlikely. But who would do such a thing? It seems like this happened out of the blue. There's also the chance it could've been an accident. But I'm sure you'd never leave an open fire unattended."

"Someone did it on purpose." A new voice entered the conversation. Conan and Ai were equally shocked when they found Ayumi standing next to them. "Nothing happens by accident around you two. Nothing."

"Ayumi-chan! Wha-umm…hi." Conan stuttered. "Eh, what do you mean by that?"

"Forget it. I need to talk to you alone." Ai dragged him away from all the commotion. When she saw that the place was relatively isolated, she mumbled, "Yoshida-san is getting suspicious of our true identities. Actually, it's more like she's practically figured out everything but our names."

Conan merely nodded with a knowing expression.

"You knew?"

"It was a hunch." He explained. "Ran's deducing the same thing but…I've always managed to prove her wrong one way or another. She's going to find out one day though. Once every lie has been stripped away, no matter how unbelievable the conclusion is, it's going to be the truth. They're not stupid. But it is surprising that Ayumi-chan found out too. We've made the mistake of underestimating them. I'd much rather have them find out the truth from us rather then having them find out themselves. Tell her. Maybe the truth would distance her from trouble when she realizes how serious this is."

Ai leveled him with a flat skeptical look.

Conan shook his head. "Tell her to stop by Ran's place tomorrow. It's where you'll be staying anyway. We'll both tell them everything there."

She had almost forgotten about where she was going to stay. Looking back at the charred remains of the house, Ai could only hope that everything would turn out for the best. Everything was moving so fast.

Conan started speaking again, but this time with a wistful tone. "You know, Ai…up till now, I've never been able to relate to your pain. I'd like to think I can understand at least a portion of it now. Professor Agasa's house holds a lot of memories for me too."

"No, Kudo. You'd never understand. Never. Go on with your happy little life. You don't know what it feels like to be a curse. Just go away."

Perhaps that's what Ai should've said. It certainly would add a bit more drama to this, wouldn't it? But…it'd also hurt Conan's feelings. Ai was done with pain. People never did react nicely to pain. Treating them cruelly obviously had not succeeded in driving any of them away, it had only succeeded in gaining distance from them at the very most. She wouldn't drag anyone down in her own punishment. They always seemed worried whenever she'd say something death-related. It was time to ease their worries.

But what could do it…?

Oh, of course.

"Thank you, Kudo. Shall we go salvage what we can?"

Sherry warned her against it.

Shiho said it was useless.

But what did Ai do?

She smiled.

**A**/**N: I have been so utterly stupid. I forgot to thank you all for your reviews! How much more unthankful could I get? –kicks self- Here they are, starting from the first chapter!**

**Me:** My first ever reviewer. Heh, thanks. –grins- Since you're anonymous, and I don't know if you've changed your name when reviewing, I just might thank you a few more times without knowing it…O.o

**fanfic luver:** Lol, glad you liked the idea of Ai torturing the mini detective. Much thanks!

**Kanika Meskhenet: **Sorry if I royally screwed up your name by misspelling it on accident…x.x But thanks for your reviews! Heh, yeah I seem to bring out the best in them. . 

**samiechanshinichiluver:** Hey, thanks a lot for dropping a review.

**PyroKid:** A huge thanks for leaving a review and adding me to your C2 Community.

**Annitha:** Wah! Thank you much. I'm flattered, really. –grins-

**SN 1987A:** Need I stress the huge amount of thanks I give you? Lol. I'll treasure that perfectionist side of yours till I die. If I start to pester you, bludgeon me with a tissue box. xD

**Vash:** Vash, man, you rock. Those one liners really work out for you. Eh heh, if you feel like I'm teasing you, sorry. –sweatdrop-

**kristanite: **Thanks…but what exactly does, "WE!" mean? X.x I've been wondering about that ever since I got it…are they initials that are supposed to stand for something or is it like an expression of joy? –blinks cunfuzzledly-

**jimmykudo84: **Thanks! –grins-

**Carrot Flowers:** -sways then trips over self- I was so surprised when I first read that! xD Such encouraging words…-sniffle- Lol.

**b: **Yeah, we all hope for happy endings in one way or another, don't we? –sweatdrop- I'm not sure what to make it end like though…

**Dark Koorime708: **I'm glad you like it so far. Lol.

**Spede:** Thank you so much for your input. xD And yeah…the third chapter was a bit jumbled…

**Tant:** I'd have to agree with you on the cigarette thing. There were these charred holes in my mom's car, courtesy of a cigarette, and I was always elected to be the one to sit on them whenever I rode with friends. Not fun when you ride over potholes. And about Gin's eyes, I was wondering when someone would point out that contradiction…

**First Silvera: **I'm so glad you liked that last part on chapter 4. –grins- I wasn't sure if it seemed right, but I had to show some signs of their attraction to each other. xD

**ariasunset:** Know what, I think you're right. X.x But I haven't read the manga version in…over two months or something. In short, I've forgotten. A lot. –shrugs- Good thing this is just a fanfic then. xD Yeah, I love the Ai/Conan pairing too. It's the same with their older counterparts.

**Southpaw:** Heh heh…cliffhangers…rest assured, that will not be the last one! xD

**Neil:** Lol, thanks. You like my Christmas present!

**Dagron:** Sadistic? –looks innocent- Who? Did you mean the characters or me? xD So glad you enjoyed it enough to give this a 9.9 –is amazed- O.o Them being Out Of Character should be a general warning to all. And when you say some, I think that's an understatement. –sweatdrop- I didn't know about Gin not being Vermouth's underling…hmm. X.x Bah, let's just say he was transferred underneath her authority. Lol.

**Well, thanks to all again! If I've messed up on any of your names, you can murder me, but bring me back to life again so I can finish the story. xD I am so sorry for not doing this until the sixth chapter.**


	7. Shiho and Sherry

**Updated: January 29, 2005**

**A**/**N: So you've read this far, eh? Must be pretty interested in what I'm about to do next…the suspense must really be killing you. Yup, I bet you wouldn't be able to click the back button even if I dared you right now. xD Don't you just love cliffhangers?**

**How is Ayumi going to respond? How will Ran take it? Will Conan and Ai make it through their interrogations? Will Ai ever find her true reason to smile?**

**Well, all these questions will have to wait, because this chapter is an interlude. xD Happy readings!**

**Interlude I**

Twelve year old Shiho Miyano tiredly rubbed her sleep ridden eyes as she lethargically shuffled across the room, a beaker containing a brown-yellow mixture filled to the brim in her hands. Her usually vibrant strawberry blonde hair fell limply against her head, and her sparkling sapphire eyes had been chipped away to a tarnished arctic color. Both were already telltale signs of her health, mainly lack of sleep.

The solution was all but carelessly emptied down the sink as she was instructed to do if they were to be failed. There was always the possibility of her experiment becoming a biohazard, but the organization assured her that it would be taken care of. So, she didn't worry about it.

Her tired form slumped against the sink's edge, two fingers delicately massaging her temples. Her eyelids threatened to fall shut and not open again for at least fourteen hours. Shiho cursed her weak and frail body for wanting to give up. Time was precious, and she couldn't use what little she had for sleep! She was so close…just a little more…Shiho begged for her body to hold out for just a few more hours. A few more tests, that's all she needed.

At least that's what she kept telling herself…for the first seven hours. Shiho resisted the incredibly strong urge to slam her fists on the counter out of frustration, but she couldn't stop the long vicious string of her colorful vocabulary from spilling out.

Concealing emotions she had under control. Restraining her mouth was another matter. But she was getting better at it! With age comes experience, right? And with experience comes…restraint? Eh…getting a bit off track here. Back to her dilemma.

She felt as if she could understand how Edison felt after creating 50,000 some failed light bulbs…or was it 10,000? Even then, the man still had the gall to claim, "Genius is 1 percent inspiration and 99 percent perspiration."

Shiho thought it was more of a stubborn determination of trial and error, rather than actual genius.

She knew nothing in real life was perfect the first time, but this was already her 2,300th some time! Well, actually, if she checked her log book, it was only her 2175th time…

She drained the contents into her multi-color stained sink, cleaned the equipment, and put everything back in its proper place. She felt it would be much safer if she fell asleep in her own bed, rather than in the midst of her work, surrounded by dozens of potentially lethal chemicals. The young chemist plopped back onto her stool, exhausted. She was sure to come back tomorrow morning- er…later this morning to resume her experiments.

Upon exiting, she grabbed her backpack which was stuffed with a few moderately thick textbooks. They gave her back quite a strain, but Shiho just thought of it as running with weights.

She came out from the back door, only stepping out from the shadows when she was sure no one was around. She took one last glance at the building from which she came from. It was a pharmacy. Securing her coat tighter around her shivering frame, she made her way through the cold.

Her feet carried her towards a university. That's right. Twelve year old Shiho Miyano was attending a university. She slipped through security and traveled through hidden paths to arrive at the dorms. If she was anyone else, she'd be worried about the lax on security. Since she wasn't anyone else, Shiho was quite glad, for it allowed her to travel around without too much trouble.

She pulled out two oddly shaped pins from her lab coat pocket and set her fingers to work on the lock. Her nimble fingers fiddled with the window for a moment, and she was awarded with a soft _click_. She slid it open then crawled inside as quietly as she could. The room was dark. Well, not that it was unnatural for it to be dark, seeing as it was night and no lights were turned on. She quietly made her way across the room, occasionally stumbling over random items cast onto the floor.

The lights flicked on.

Her body recoiled from the unexpected light flashing across her dilating eyes. Shiho groaned at the thought of being caught again. How utterly embarrassing…not to mention disappointing. When she hesitantly cracked one eye open, a young man around the age of twenty strode up to her. Shiho suppressed the forming pout on her face. Then she thought about it again. She soon had a full blown pout spread across her lips.

The man paused in mid-step, raising a thin eyebrow at her actions. Obviously he knew Shiho otherwise it wouldn't have been so surprising to see her pouting. He examined her intently much like a sculpture judging his masterpiece. He smirked. "Such foolish mistakes you make every day, maggot." He spat out harshly. "Your little act is in dire need of improvement. I can already see that you have a gun hidden underneath your coat."

Meet Mackwell Pierce, he's a twenty-one year old man with sandy blonde hair parted on the left, the ends of his hair barely falling over his sharp haunting eyes. If Shiho had to describe the color, she'd say it resembled mud smeared over a ruby gem. His irises were light brown with specks of brilliant red shining through them. Oh, but his other features were not to be overlooked either. To say he was quite pleasing to the eye would've been an understatement. Mackwell had the talent to reduce even the most mature of women into giddy little school girls with a mere look in their direction but… often times he was just trying to catch a glance of the clock behind them…

One would think with his handsome looks, numerous women would flock to him, but his cold and inhospitable attitude turns many of them away. Mackwell would even go as far as to creating an exploding concoction just to scare them away. Actually, he has. Instead of socializing, partying, and having an all around good time, the man pours over his studies and researching the ability to eternally prolong death or otherwise known as immortality.

He had no interest at all in women. Or men for that matter… Love, relationships, finding "the one", all of those things was deemed as vanity to him. His two cents on the topic of love would be, _"Waste of time, waste of money, and waste of good sanity."_ He believed if he could reach a state of immortality, then he could gain everything in the world. Nothing would be able to stop him. To gain immortality, that was a cause worthy of his superior intellect and attention. He would take advantage of the Organization's funding to complete it too.

Such a man was registered as Shiho's guardian by orders of the Black Organization in case Shiho had second thoughts about working for the organization. If she ever showed any harmful intentions towards the Black Organization, Mackwell was to –quite literally- strike her down on the spot.

To the outside world, Mackwell and Shiho are known under the names of Lance and Alice Blackthorn respectively. Seeing as they were supposedly related, they were placed in the same dormitory room.

Shiho looked down to inspect where she had gone wrong in the placement of her gun. Granted, it was just an air gun, but there would be many questions if she was ever found carrying one. "And people actually believe that you're some depressed loner insanely obsessed with alchemy in your spare time, Mackwell?"

The man shrugged in his casual manner. "Why ask me? Is it something I have control over?" He asked in a cold and clipped tone. It sounded as if he was restraining a certain emotion from entering his voice.

"I suppose not…" She answered evenly. Shiho wasn't intimidated by him. She knew he was just one of those people that liked to snap at people coldly, but he was a gentle soul...well, as gentle of a soul a Syndicate member could be. His education was also funded by the Black Organization just like Shiho's.

"So where were you returning from this time of day?" Both knew the question wasn't necessary, but it was asked nonetheless.

Shiho smiled mysteriously, a habit she picked up while living with her fellow organization member. Ambiguous answers irked Mackwell to no end, and the girl just loved getting under his skin. It was like a game they played, exchanging sarcastic remarks with each other until one could not make a comeback, a battle of wits if you will. The two would do little things simply to bug the heck out of the other. Could it be classified as a friendly rivalry? Seeing an alchemist and chemist coexisting under the same roof was interesting indeed.

The two shared a most curious relationship. It wasn't quite to the point of a brother-sister one. It looked no where near a father-daughter one. It couldn't even be considered friends, and they seemed to know each other too well for them to be just acquaintances. The age difference between them was too great to even begin suggesting anything more intimate. It was probably more of a house-arrestee and guard type thing.

"Well?" He asked, not accepting her silent reply as a satisfactory answer.

A mischievous gleam entered Shiho's eyes. "I'm touched by your concern."

Mackwell scoffed, and the subject was left alone. He slipped back into the bottom bunk bed but not before turning the lights off.

Shiho glanced at the glowing digits of their alarm clock. Based on the numbers, dawn was about to break out. She yawned freely without bothering to cover her mouth. No one was around to see but a sleeping Mackwell, and he wasn't even facing her. She changed in the bathroom then climbed into the top bunk and fell asleep just as fast as the lights clicked off.

Later that morning, Shiho sat in her 11 A.M. class, almost ready to gouge her own eyes out with her mechanical pencil. Wait, what I meant to say was that she would've gouged her own eyes out if not for the fact that her hands were cramped too badly to move. In her notebook, pages and pages were filled with notes, diagrams, and charts neatly copied down but slightly messier where she started writing with her other hand. She could've sworn her fingers were twitching from the abuse.

As for being able to write with either hand, Shiho had developed that skill for quite some time now and has been perfecting it ever since she discovered that one hand simply could not bare the amount of strenuous note taking. Being ambidextrous was very important for her if she wanted to survive through college.

Shiho did her best to stay attentive, but her mind kept drifting towards her experiments. There was just something strange about them. She didn't get it. What was the purpose in creating a drug that not one autopsy machine, no matter how advanced, could identify? It was an impossible task. Yet…the organization was willing to pay for all her college expenses. Why would they do such a thing, simply for her to strive after an impossible goal? There had to be something more to this, something she had yet to comprehend. Shiho had her suspicions about it becoming a strong negotiation factor or a way to try up loose ends, but still she could not be sure.

But should she really try to investigate? Was it really worth the risk? What if the information was classified- Wait. If they wouldn't tell her, then it probably is privileged information. So that thought was out. Would her curiosity threaten her life? An even scarier thought entered her mind. Would it threaten her sister's life?

Unlike Shiho, her sister Akemi was somewhat happily living her life with a foster family without being hounded by the Black Organization. What exactly would happen if Shiho found out she was creating something against her beliefs and terminated the project? Would the Organization force her to complete it by threatening her sister? And what exactly could she find out about her experiments that would have her stop them? Perhaps ignorance truly was bliss…

Shiho was torn by indecision. It felt like her insides were going through a paper shredder with all the nerves still connected to her, so she felt each and every blade shredding through her. Should she attempt to find out? Or remain as the Organization's puppet, bending towards all their whims? Should she just run away, leaving everything behind and live the life of a person wanted by the Organization? Would she just leave her sister's fate subject to the Black Organization?

A sharp jab into her side brought Shiho out of her musings. Her head whipped towards Mackwell to the left of her to accuse him of the injustice, but he merely sat there staring at the front blankly, uninterested. That's when she noticed a majority of the students were staring in her direction, some snickering.

Before she had time to ponder their actions or discover her assaulter, someone to the immediate right of her cleared their throat impatiently. As she turned to see who was creating that distracting sound, she noticed the professor normally stationed at the front of the class was missing.

Where had she gone to?

Oh.

Shiho found the missing professor fixing her with an unimpressed look.

Shiho tried to play it off coolly, wanting as little trouble as possible. "Did you need something, Professor?" She smiled blithely at her. Oh, it was a horrible tiresome act she practiced everyday.

"Miss…Blackthorn, was it? You are indeed a very remarkable person."

Shiho inwardly frowned, sensing a disturbance in the force but kept her outward happy appearance, acting like the stereotypical twelve year old. "Thanks!" She forced herself to chirp. Ugh, where was a barf bag when you needed one?

"I've met very few people with the rare ability to sleep with their eyes open," Her professor continued in a stern tone, "But I've met even fewer who would dare to try in my class."

"Shi-" The twelve year old began hotly. "-taki mushrooms…" She finished weakly. Shiho couldn't exactly tell her teacher that she had not been sleeping with her eyes closed, but was merely not paying attention. "That's what I was dreaming about." She found her mouth moving of its own accord. Shiho grimaced in her mind. Not only did she dig her own grave, she was decorating it with pink sprinkles and streamers. "I apologize, Professor. But your last class talked about how fears affect your dreams, and when we performed that experiment, it never caught up to me until now."

Her professor locked on to her with a skeptical look. If you were placed inside the professor's mind, you could see the flashing red crosshair…"You're afraid of shitake mushrooms?"

"Deathly allergic of them, Professor."

"I see. Well, I'd like to discuss this…interesting allergy of yours after class, so, Miss Blackthorn, if you would stay behind?"

Shiho meekly nodded. "Yes, Professor."

The professor made her way back to the front of the room and resumed her lecture.

Out of the corner of her eye, Shiho found Mackwell smirking.

"Oh, shut up." Shiho muttered under her breath to him. "Like you've never spaced out in class."

"I haven't."

Shiho mentally took back all the nice things she said about Mackwell and didn't speak to him for quite some time after that.

**My Little Corner of Gratitude:**

**SN 1987A: **I am so glad that while you correct my errors, you also so give comments. Thanks. n.n So happy. Glad you liked the quote. xD Not sure if I was actually quoting Conan, or quoting Conan quoting Sherlock Holmes though. O.o

**silverwind:** Honestly? I've got her personality down? –cheers- I thought I only succeeded in making her an angry person. Lol. You…want a sequel too? 0.0 Wow. I'm not even half way done with this fanfic. Thanks.

**chalicity:** Thank you, thanks lots. n.n

**Dagron:** Lol, no worries. I'll hang that 9.9 up like one of those stuffed deer heads. Er…forgot what they were called. Thanks for taking your time to review.

**Haibara Ai:** Thank you so much for those encouraging words. I've…never considered having Vermouth pretend to be one of the little kids…But I don't think it'd work…not unless she turned midget all of a sudden…xD

**Spede:** Lol, glad you liked the scene with Ai, Conan, and falling pots. Thanks. n.n Plan to read more cute little scenes like that in the future. Yes…everyone's wondering what and how people are going to respond. –has evil glint in eye-

**Vash:** Whoo! It's another splendid one-liner, from the one, the only, Vash! Well, two if you count the dude from Trigun. n.n Thank you, thank you.

**First Silvera:** Interesting you say? Well, quite true. I was kind of getting tired of reading about them covering everything up all the time. I thought making them reveal themselves would make it a bit more…interesting. About Ayumi, some kids are just natural actors. Lol. Thanks for your review.

**anime-obsession260: **You think so highly of my story…thanks. xD I wouldn't exactly call it perfect though. There's a bunch of mistakes that SN 1987A finds for me when I'm too sleepy to catch them. –glares at the mistakes- Sneaky lil' devils…Wow. You sound like you're really hanging from a cliff there. Oh my…should I continue with a part II interlude or continue with the story? xD


	8. My Twisted Warped Logic

**A**/**N: Such…murderous intentions. O.o Meepish. Well, for those of you that nearly fell of a cliff-passes out rock climbing gear- There. xD That's my solution to cliffhangers. For those of you who might get confused easily…bear with me, because this chapter just might do just that. This is what happens when you try writing with a cold. X.x Oh, by the way, the person that can spot the most quotes in this chapter and send it to me by review or email can suggest what they want one of the chapter in the future to be like! xD **

At first, Kogoro adamantly refused, not wanting anymore 'kids' in his living quarters than there were already. Of course, he gave in straight away when Ran threatened to not cook dinner. He grumbled after losing and locked himself in a room, making a point not to be disturbed. Ai was to stay, and neither Ran nor Conan would have it any other way.

Amidst the cluttered office of the Mouri Detective Agency, Ai had been sitting on the couch reading a magazine she found lying around for the better part of the day. She couldn't stand having her mind idle. She was also inwardly surprised at how quickly she recovered from the incident. It hadn't even been a day. Was she truly that heartless? No…Ai didn't think so. Maybe it was just her way of thinking…

When something is proven useless, you move on, right? A charred house wasn't going to do her any good and worrying over it wouldn't either. Everything was eventually going to die out anyway.

Ai had been considering a few things ever since the fire. One of them being if she should stay here as a dead weight, burdening them or…run away to start a new life. It worked pretty well the first time. All she had to do was give them a reason not to go after her.

The weight on the couch suddenly shifted beside her, interrupting her musings. Ai glanced over and found a sniffing Ran beside her. Ai assumed that Ran was crying of relief that Professor Agasa was still alive but briefly wondered why Ran was down here instead of crying in the privacy of her own room. Ai didn't dwell on it long before going back to her reading. Maybe if she was really, really quiet, she'd turn invisible.

"Ai-kun?"

Darn.

The girl in question turned to Ran, setting the magazine aside. Before Ai could react, Ran engulfed her into a hug. The girl was confused at the action, but also a bit annoyed. What was with people hugging her lately? This was the third one today. Then Ai realized what it was. She opened her mouth to reassure Ran. "I'm fine."

Ran tightened her hold around the little girl who had quickly become another important part of her life in the past few months. "But…your house just burnt down…you could've died…" Ai didn't resist as Ran pulled her onto her lap, still hugging her like a cherished stuffed animal.

It felt strange to Ai. It wasn't because Ran felt like a second sister, but rather it was how Ran could accept her so easily. She trusted her without question. How would Ran react once they told her she held a murderer in her arms? Ai felt she never wanted that question to be answered. She could be content with never finding out.

Curiosity killed the cat, and if it didn't succeed the first time, a steamroller would finish the job.

The sound of soft footsteps alerted the two females of a new presence in the room. Conan stood hesitantly near the last step, not sure if he should speak. They each found an interesting object to stare at, rather than at each other. There was a long silence until Ran released Ai and stood up, walking toward the kitchen.

"Is there anything in particular you two wanted to eat?"

"Anything's fine."

"No."

Conan and Ai were left in the room alone. The room was silent, aside from Ran's preparations for dinner. The miniature detective slid into a seat on the opposite couch from Ai's. Wasting no time, he pulled out an old photograph from his coat pocket and slid it across the table. "Look familiar?" He asked casually. Ai couldn't really say she was surprised at his abrupt transformation from innocent kid to high school detective.

It was an old thing turning yellow from exposure. The photograph had its share of crinkles and folds to last it a lifetime. It seemed so fragile, like touching it would have it turn to dust. Parts of the photo had even started to fade.

She met his gaze evenly before glancing down at the photograph, cautious from Conan's eerily calm behavior. It was like a geyser before it rumbled and erupted. You knew something was about to happen…just not when.

The picture consisted of six people, happily smiling into the camera, save one, as if they didn't have a care in the world. Even after all these years, Ai could identify them easily. She struggled to tear her gaze from the photo, trying not to give away any indication of it being familiar.

"Perhaps the message on the back might jog your memory." His tone gained a bit of an edge.

Seeing as Conan wouldn't leave the issue alone, she picked up the photograph and flipped it over to humor him. Ai looked up at him with a blank expression. "What?" She asked bluntly. "Were you expecting me to have a violent flashback? Or maybe even cry myself into a little ball, spilling my darkest secrets out to you?"

Who was he to demand personal information from her? He acted like he had the right to know, and that alone irked Ai's temper. Her first response was to deny everything and go on the defensive.

Conan frowned at how uncooperative she was being. "Yes, something along those lines." He crossed his arms and narrowed his eyes at her. "When were you planning on telling me your eyes are originally brown? What is it that hides them? Color contacts?" One could learn a lot from a picture. Conan certainly did. After all, a picture was worth a thousand words…

She smiled. "Oh my…sharp, aren't you? I wasn't aware I had to share everything about myself with you though. It's not like you ever cared enough to ask. Then again, it shouldn't have been too surprising. After all, blue is a recessive eye color. Think about it. I told you I was half Japanese and British. Brown is dominant, and blue is recessive. Once you put two and two together, it should be fairly simple. Surely you've covered genetics in school." The chemist finished dryly.

She reached up, placing a finger in her eye, then drawing it away to reveal a blue disk on the tip of her index finger. Conan found it a bit disconcerting to see two different colored eyes staring back at him. His spine involuntarily stiffened as he took it from her to examine.

Ai couldn't help but look amused at his reaction. Her smile spread wider. "So how'd you come across this old picture?" She flipped the old photograph over and over, looking thoughtful.

"Surprisingly enough, Professor Agasa had a fireproof box filled with assorted items. This was only one of them." The air around them had suddenly turned hostile. "I'd like to ask you what this picture was doing there."

Sure, they had their share of disagreements before, but…this…was just different.

To Conan, the chemist seemed to be completely comfortable with her surroundings, not flinching or nervous at all. Her smile, that rarely seen smile Conan once considered beautiful, grew frustrating and irritating. "I spy…" She drawled out. "A miniature detective with his feathers ruffled."

Conan bristled at her remark, insulted. "How many secrets are you keeping from me?" How much longer would she dangle clues leading to the Black Organization in front of his face before she was satisfied?

She inwardly cursed at herself for angering him even more, but honestly, did he expect her to spill all of her secrets to him? _"Dig a grave for yourself any further, and people will start thinking you're looking for oil." _Well, he should at least respect her privacy, right? "I'm sorry…am I poking holes in your self-esteem bucket?" Ai asked with mocking sarcasm. "I'm not in the mood for your interrogations."

"Listen to me, Haibara." His eyes flashed angrily as he snarled out. "You know something about the Black Organization that I need to know, and I will not stop until I do. That picture is proof enough. Don't you realize what you haven't told me might have resulted in both yours and Professor Agasa's death?" Conan barely restrained his voice from rising.

It was her turn to be insulted. She makes a few mistakes, and suddenly he thinks she's an idiot? Like she doesn't know what's going on or what could happen? Was he insinuating that the fire was her fault? Ai fixed him with a glare. "If I throw a stick, will you go away?"

Tension in the room was tossed around the room, bouncing off walls with hurricane force winds. Conan and Ai entered a silent glaring contest until the boy was fed up with her behavior. "Explain yourself, Miyano!" He roared with outrage as his hands slammed down onto the table between them. His glasses fell from his nose, dropping to the table with a clatter.

Ai gathered her cool composure and turned away from him, much like a cat disapproving of its food. She closed her eyes to show how uninterested she was in what he had to say. "So this is what they mean by hot-blooded." She replied, unperturbed.

Ran hurried into the room at Conan's outraged cry. "Conan-kun? What happened?" She asked, startled.

The boy gritted his teeth angrily. "A certain someone by the name of Shiho Miyano is being very difficult."

The other victim of the APTX-4869 in the room turned to Ran with a calm smile saying, "It's nothing, Mouri-san. Your boyfriend Shinichi is just being his usual hot-headed self."

The use of different names to refer to each other didn't escape Ran, especially when she heard Conan being called Shinichi. Her eyes widened considerably, shocked at the two. "Ai-kun…Conan-kun…what do you mean?"

He let out a curse. "You fool! This wasn't what I had in mind when I said we were going to explain to her about ourselves!"

"Conan…Shinichi…?"

Her anger coursed through her in a calm silent manner. Conan had just pushed one of Ai's buttons he didn't even know existed. "Don't…you…**Ever.** Call me a fool."

"What…how?"

Conan and Ai continued arguing, not paying attention to Ran's broken sentences. The teen uttered a few more confused questions before it was too much for her mind to take. In an effort to save her brain from exploding, Ran's body too the liberty of shutting down, resulting in a dead faint. Only then did Conan break away from his arguing and rush to Ran's side. Ai, on the other hand, silently made her way out the room and down the stairs into the street before Conan noticed she was gone.

It was too late to regret what she had done and was about to do. All she could think of was to run…run and run fast. But something held her back. Ai let out a heavy sigh, her hot breath condensing in a wispy cloud in the cool night. Neither Conan nor Shinichi would ever want to speak to her again, and Ai could only hope it was sufficient to never be forgiven.

She leaned against the building taking in deep breaths, chilling her lungs with the freezing air. That had to be one of the hardest things she had to do. Ai bit her lower lip, an old habit she thought Mackwell had helped her break. The sound of a door being thrown open was all Ai needed to start running in the opposite direction.

The cold wind bit into her, and her breathing came in short gasps, but she refused to stop even when she felt lightheaded. Running in the dark night…the feeling of pursuit…freezing down to her bones…not having any particular destination…it felt so nostalgic. A feeling Ai was sure she would've been better off without. _"First I run to Kudo, thinking he could help. Now I'm running away from him, thinking it would help."_ Her mouth grew dry. _"Shiho…when did all logic desert you?"_ She asked herself bitterly.

Running wouldn't do her any good. She'd have to go back and face them sooner or later…not unless she was running away permanently. Well, the thought had crossed her mind once. Twice. Okay, maybe a few times.

Ai ran pass numerous shops and houses, ducked in and out of every corner she could find, just in case Conan was tracking her. Then, she suddenly skidded to a stop, almost slipping on the slick pavement. Of course he could've been tracking her! She stuffed her hand into her skirt pocket, retrieving the Junior Detective League badge, complete with walkie-talkie and tracking device. She paused and gazed at it wistfully, hesitating at what she was about to do.

She shook her head to clear her mind, steeling herself with determination. _"Kudo has no need for me anymore. Professor Agasa's lab is gone, the last remaining samples of the APTX-4869 are gone and so are the antidotes. The most I've probably done is placing them in danger."_

She took a deep breath and released in a heavy sigh, realizing what she had to do to keep them safe. _"It doesn't matter who I am. I'll cause trouble wherever I go. I might as well cause it away from my friends, so they won't be affected." _A bitter smile graced her lips. _"It may be that my only purpose in life is to serve as a warning to others. In any case, forgive me everyone. Mouri-san…he may not my place to give, but take good care of Kudo…that stupid head-strong detective is going to get himself killed one day, and he'll need you to keep him out of trouble."_

Ai licked her dry lips, tasting a trail of salt. She was surprising to find tears coming out from her eyes. One blue, one brown. She hadn't even noticed her eyes burning until now. Her hand fisted around the plastic badge so hard, the edges cut into her skin. In some twisted way, it all made sense to her. Before, she had the vague impression, but Ai could never place exactly what the feeling was. She always felt little tidbits of it here and there, occasionally surfacing at the strangest times. But now she knew. She now realized why she doing this.

Swallowing hard, she made her final decision and whispered, "Goodbye."

With that final word almost echoing in the night, Ai drew her hand back with her eyes closed in a stance much like a baseball pitcher's and flung her plastic Junior Detective League badge - the last connection she had to them - high and as far as she could into the murky night sky. The stars reminded her of Ayumi's room…

"_I've failed…I'm running away once again. I'm so sorry…Please, forgive me."_

…

With a start, Ai woke up at four in the morning. Her blanket had been long since kicked aside. She took a few deep calming breaths, looking around the room just to make sure she was still there and not foolishly running away like she was in her dream.

But there was the strangest thing…what in the world was Conan doing sleeping with his face so close to hers? And on the same pillow no less. Of course, being a gentleman, he was sitting on a chair, but half of him was still draped over the bed!

If Ai was the type, she probably would've screamed bloody murder and bludgeoned him to kingdom come with a tissue box.

But since she wasn't, Ai merely closed her eyes trying to get back to sleep, and with any luck, Conan would be the first to wake up next time and resolve the situation himself, so she didn't have to deal with it. Sometimes…it was just best to leave things be.

**Oh man…x.x I really don't like this chapter, but I forgot all the other versions for it. I can't believe I made a chapter with Ai wanting to give up Conan to Ran. In a dream but still! How could I…? Lol. In all honesty, I'm an anti-Ran person. I like her somewhat for being able to kick butt, but something about Ran just irks me. Anyway, Review time! xD**

**Dagron:** Aw…you're too kind. Really. Hmm…yeah, I wonder if the flashback chapters have something to do with her smile too. -sweatdrop- Truthfully, I never actually decided what I was going to do with that chapter, even after I posted it. Er…don't tell anyone else. xD As for all the chapters about Shiho's college life, every one of them will be named **Shiho and Sherry**, so hopefully it won't be too hard to find, lol. Thanks for taking your time to review!

**SN 1987A:** Lol, got ya. No more A/N's in the middle of the text. Nice that you found it somewhat humorous though. O.o About the professor caring if student fell asleep issue, I asked our student teacher –since I didn't know either- and he said some of them do. He told me he had this one professor who actually slammed a yardstick on your desk to wake you up. Scary. Much thanks for your review!

**kristanite:** Oh! "WE!" As in, "Whee!" and not, "Welcome Executioners!" O.o Can't believe I didn't catch that. Thanks. n.n

**Silver Sky Magician: **Thanks for reviewing. Lol, I try to capture people's attention with a bit of humor in the beginning. xD What worries me is the next few chapters after the first two. O.o Are they too…what? Lacking? Sad? Sappy? And calm down, or I might have to schedule you an anger management class. Lol.

**jack5-adam:** Umm…thank you.

**First Silvera: **-sighs in relief- Whew. Glad you liked the idea of Mackwell. Most people don't respond well to characters not in the original DC series. I wasn't sure if that chapter would go over well. Thanks. n.n

**anime-obsession260:** Don't know why, but I love saying the word "shitake". xD Much thanks for reviewing.

**Spede:** Lol, oops, was that me? xD I guess this chapter didn't help much with you wanting to know about their explanation either, eh? Heh, heh…Mackwell will remain a mystery…for now. Lol, thank you, thank you.

**Vash:** Thanks for reviewing, but it cunfuzzled you? Uh oh. That's not good. Well, I was trying to have that chapter show Shiho/Ai's past. You know how you always hear about her attending college in America but never get to see what happens? I was trying to remedy that.

**Alpha Draconis1:** Aww…you liked the idea too? xD I'm so glad…I mean, I'd never do anything to upset my readers. I think. Much thanks, lol.

**b:** Oh no, don't worry. Those interludes will only happen every so often. Thanks for stopping by. n.n

**Takeru Yamamoto:** Bah, you spoil me with your praise. I'd just like to thank God for giving me the talent. xD If your pen name isn't from Digimon, I'm sorry, but I love Takeru! He's one of my favorite anime characters ever. But I really don't like his hats. . Strangely enough, Takeru, the anime character, inspired me to write. O.o Just thought I'd share that. Thank you, lol.

**Crystal Snowflakes:** Hey, thanks for reviewing! xD Hope this chapter didn't scare you away.


	9. I Think I Need Glasses

Ai blinked. Two times. This was not what she had expected at all. Not even close to what she had predicted. If anyone were to ask her what she thought of the situation at this very second, she'd probably give the person a nasty glare, clearing wanting to be left alone. But if one of her friends asked her about it…she'd tell her friend that she was very perplexed.

Most times, Ai was very quick to accept, process, and adapt to new information. She's a chemist, years of practice making her an extremely acute observer. Not much escaped her line of vision or knowledge. She was often the one with keen foresight, perceiving anything and everything that came her way before it came within fifteen feet of her. Her logic, common sense, and radar for danger were what had kept her alive and kicking for the most part so far. They helped her avoid any unnecessary predicaments.

This afternoon, she discovered they weren't always the most dependable things to rely on. She discovered it in a most…untimely and abrupt manner. It was like speeding down the halls when you were late for class, then without warning, a door flings open, and you run right into it smack-dab in the face, no air brakes included.

Alright, to cut this short, Ai was surprised.

Let's recap this morning along with Ai, shall we?

Zzz.

Zzz…

_"I do not want to wake up. I do not want to wake up. I do not want to- Oh, crud. Conscious thought, I'm awake."_ Ai groggily peeled her eyelids apart and watched as the two blurry looking floating alarm clocks merge into one.

She glanced out the window. The sun was shining, birds were singing, cars were honking, and- Oh, who was she kidding? The weather was horrible. The sky was a very dark overcast gray with a heavy torrent of rain, terrorizing every pedestrian except for the occasional few who enjoyed being soaked down to their undergarments. Not even umbrellas would spare those outside from the downpour. Ai was indeed very thankful for the roof over her head.

She allowed herself a morning yawn before getting out of bed, rubbing her eyes. They stubbornly refused to stay open. Ai raked through her hair with her fingers, knowing that it was always a mess in the morning. It would've been easier with a comb, but that simply was not an option at the moment. She wasn't one to be overly concerned with her looks, but Ai knew she had to at the very least maintain a decent and tidy appearance. Though…she seemed to have some trouble with keeping that neat and tidy look of hers.

Ai looked down at herself, assessing her clothes. Ran hadn't kept any clothes that didn't fit, not even the ones from her childhood. Everything that was too small Ran sent to the children's shelter a couple of blocks away. This meant the only thing Ai could've worn were clothes much too big for her, unlike Conan who at least had some clothes that fit him.

The oversized shirt Ran had lent her always seemed to slide one way, revealing her shoulder no matter how much effort Ai put into straightening it. Thankfully, Ran did have shorts that were small enough for Ai. But…this led Ai to wonder why in the world would Ran be keeping something that short. On Ai, they looked fine. I mean, it reached below her knees. But on Ran?

The miniature chemist decided it was a question best left unanswered.

Ai pulled the annoying collar up to prevent it from slipping over her shoulder again. She had thought about tying a knot to make the collar smaller, but then it wouldn't leave enough room for oxygen to travel down her throat comfortably.

She pulled it up again as it slipped.

And again.

And again.

And again.

In the end, Ai left the stupid collar alone and went to see if the bathroom was available or to find her own clothes. The few they had managed to salvage.

On her way out, she noticed that the chair Conan had been occupying for the better part of the night had been scooted back in its original place. There was no evidence of it being beside the bed. She half-smiled. Conan was probably guarding her last night. He thought she would run again. It wasn't fair of him to think that way, but maybe it was just the feeling she emitted. After all, Ai's ran away from her troubles more than once. Who's to say she won't do it again?

Her hand rested on the doorknob when another thought occurred to her. "_Why is this all about me? Why did everything have to be about me? Have I ever made a decision without thinking of myself first?"_ She frowned at this revelation. Surely there must have been something.

Well, what about the antidote for Kudo? _"To ease to my guilt."_ Her mind answered promptly.

Befriending Ayumi, Genta, and Mitsuhiko? _"Initially to 'blend in' more with the other kids at our school."_

But what about- _"No! I refuse to continue this. Must stop all these random little musings. Life is so much more tolerable without them. There are more urgent matters at hand that need to be taken into consideration rather than these strays."_

Sighing, she twisted the doorknob open and walked out, expecting to see a plain hallway but instead, nearly running into a grim looking Conan standing right outside the door. Ai made a disgruntled sound in her throat as she stumbled over his feet. Conan walked past her, gave no indication of her presence being there, and started pacing in the room she had previously been occupying.

She rolled her eyes, figuring it was just typical Conan behavior, and made her way down the steps. Apparently, the boy had other plans when he dragged her back into the room. Ai opened her mouth to ask him what was so important that he had to speak to her about it now, but Conan -once again- began pacing back and forth. Her mouth shut with an audible click.

Ai huffed irritably. Fine, if Conan was going to pull her in here just to overlook her, Ai could do the same.

She sat on the bed and pulled at the collar again, feeling more self-conscious than usual. With her arms crossed, trying to keep the collar up at the same time, she draped one leg over the other and proceeded to ignore the pacing detective.

What a mature pair of kids, huh?

This went on for about a minute or two until Ai neared her boiling point. She struggled to keep her expression neutral, although Conan wouldn't have noticed even if she started yelling at him. He was much too engrossed in his thoughts. In her mind, Ai was mentally ticking off a list words synonymous with, "rude", "moronic", "haughty", and a few others much too inappropriate to be included in print. Oh, and her mind briefly flickered to how attractive a brooding Conan was, but that goes without saying.

Uh oh. Ai had to come up with something to distract her thoughts, quick. "Is there any particular reason you dragged me in here? I doubt you wanted a spectator merely for your pacing."

Conan mumbled a long string of words that Ai could absolutely not comprehend.

A sweatdrop rolled down her head, all previous traces of agitation gone. There must be something to catch his attention…Think, Ai. Think of something clever.

"You ever notice how almost every time we leave our houses, some unexpected murder turns up? I mean it's really amazing how high the crime rate is in this city." The words came out from her mouth before she had a chance to think them over.

She heard him say something along the lines of, "Yeah, there must be something in the water that makes everyone in the country really mean and angry." Ai had nothing to say to that.

There was a moment of terse silence before Ai had the notion to strangle the boy.

_Fwoop-! Thunk. Thunk, thunk._

Great. Now the soccer ball was out. She watched him juggle the ball around while clearing his thoughts. The ball went from his foot, to his knee, and from his knee into the air.

"That's it!" He exclaimed proudly. The effect was ruined when his soccer ball fell from the air, bouncing off his head. But that didn't deter his jubilant mood. With a huge dopey grin, Conan clasped her hands in his and dropped on one knee asking-

"Haibara…will you help me?"

Ai blinked. Two times. Her mind nearly came crashing at a stand-still until her back-up battery –reason- flickered on. For some reason, she was expecting the fourth word to be something entirely different…

_"Okay…think this out rationally before you say or do anything. Right. Now first things first. If I agreed, what would I be entitling myself into?"_

Very calmly, with a deliberate arch of her eyebrow, she asked quite bluntly, "With what?"

"Umm…I can't tell you that." His eyes were a bit distracted when Ai's shirt inched downwards revealing the top of her shoulder.

Ai knew exactly what caught Conan's attention. She wanted to slap him but very well couldn't, seeing as her hands were held together tightly in his. Well, there was always another way to discourage him from any similar actions. If Ai knew he wasn't interested in pursuing Ran, she probably would've let this side, but since he was…

"Interested?" She teased with a smirk.

"Wha-? No!" His face colored when he realized that he was caught, flustered by her bold question.

Ai pretended to be confused, looking very innocent as if not knowing what he was referring to. "So you don't need my help after all?"

"Yes! I do need your help! I meant that I wasn't interested in…" Conan cut himself off. He cleared his throat. "Look, do you want to help me or not?"

"I'd be more comfortable with that thought if I knew what I'm going to help you with."

"No way! You'd make fun of me."

"It's inevitable."

"Gee, thanks."

"You're quite welcome. Now are you going to tell me what it is?"

He stayed silent for a while. "Haibara, I need you to help me on my date with Ran."

Her back stiffened. Conan sure was one for surprises. "Exactly how did this happen?"

Standing up, he said, "Well, I told Ran—she took it pretty well." He said that like it was the most casual thing in the world. He gave no outward indication of how relieved he was that none of the disastrous scenarios he ran though his mind came true.

Ai could tell there was something more to this though. Something that Conan didn't bother to mention. Conveniently forgot, perhaps. Curious as to why he didn't go into a full detailed explanation of how Ran fell to her knees, enclosing him into a loving embrace that would've crushed any other boy's lungs, and how he at the same time, professed his undying love for Ran, Ai pressed on for a more thorough account. Assuming that what was had happened, of course. Then again, she shouldn't press her luck.

"And that was it? That's how she agreed to date the vertically-challenged Kudo Shinichi? Because you miraculously appeared from right under her nose?"

"Could you possibly be any more supportive? You might as well take out a shotgun and shoot me down now."

"My main priority is not to be supportive. It's to keep you, me, and everyone else around us alive, so that maybe—just _maybe_ one day we'll have a future, rather than rotting away in some secluded area for some poor unsuspecting citizen to stumble across our dead bodies."

Ai was rambling, and she knew it. When she rambled, it meant her mind would subconsciously chose words that would betray her most secretive thoughts.

Conan fell silent. He heard the message hidden in between the lines loud and clear. His knowing eyes locked onto hers, unwavering.

Ai felt the sudden impulse to squirm or fidget under his gaze, but caught herself and held still. _"Curse him! Don't tell me I fell for his clueless innocent kid act, too! He was probably operating in 'detective mode' behind that cheeky grin of his. Whatever. I guess he finally figured it out…and I guess he wants nothing to do with me. Not that I blame him. I've just been kidding myself all along. There's no hope for us together."_

She forced herself to smile, to smile like she had been planning this the whole time and wasn't duped by him at all. But nothing had gone the way she wanted it to. In her eyes, this was as clear of a rejection she was going to get.

"Just kidding." She forced herself to say in a joking manner. Her throat burned, but she covered it by smirking to hide the way her facial muscles tightened. _"I'm such a pathetic little liar."_

Ai almost laughed out loud at her own sporadic thoughts. They seemed to pop up, accusing her of things like this at the oddest times. To her surprise, it was Conan who beat her to it, letting out a shaky laugh.

"Haha…You idiot…" His expression softened as he gently squeezed her hands. "You really do like crying, don't you?" He commented with a half-smile.

"H—How did you come to that conclusion?" Ai stammered, feeling her face warming. It was not only an embarrassing thing to be accused of, but also ridiculous. How could anyone possibly enjoy crying until their eyes were puffy and red? To think that she would enjoy crying…was Conan deranged or something?

Conan shook his head without breaking eye contact, the sad half-smile never leaving his face. "You underestimate me."

She blinked stubbornly and averted her gaze, refusing to comment any further lest her voice crack.

He sighed, looking at her ruefully. "Haibara…stop tearing yourself apart like this."

"What are you going on about?" Ai mumbled when she felt her voice wouldn't fail her.

"Do you want to play Go-Fish?" He asked suddenly.

Ai let out a short laugh, the urge to cry fading. "Are you serious?"

He reached into his pocket and pulled out a deck of cards. Conan sat down on the bed next to her with enough space let between them for him to pass out the cards. "I am very serious about this. What?" He smirked at her. "Afraid to lose?"

Ai smiled, realizing that he wasn't going to pry. Thankful for the change of subject, she resigned herself to play at least one game with him.

"Just deal the cards."

**A**/**N: Well, for those of you who'd like to know about this chapter's delay, it was because my monitor blew up. Not blew up in the atomic bomb sense, but I mean it doesn't work anymore. I'm using this really old monitor that's so blurry, I can't tell from an "l" from an "i". The same thing happens with various other letters. Luckily, my friend was kind enough to let me use his computer for the time being. Of course, this kind friend of mine also happens to be grumbling and complaining beside me while I take up his precious computer time. xD Oops. **

**Dagron:** Gah! -thinks- I know what that line means…but I'm not sure how to explain it. Umm…Ai felt since Conan was never hers, she had no right to give him away to someone, but nonetheless wants him to be cared for…This is the best I could come up with. The saying makes perfect sense in my mind, but comes out all wrong when I type it out. Sorry. –sweatdrop-

**SN1987A:** I did change it to Tragedy, didn't I? –blinks in confusion- I have no idea how that happened…Wait. I recall a certain younger brother invading my room and messing with my computer. Maybe he did it. Hmm…ah, whatever. It's not a big deal. I can just change it. xD

**sacred-aliance:**

**Kaitou1412Kid:** Really? You think so too? xD

**a critic:** I really appreciate you taking your time to tell me all this. I really do. But I honestly can not take your review seriously, because you will not risk your own reputation for what you feel is true about my fanfic. I will take it into consideration, but nothing further than that. I have nothing against you at all, but this feels like something I must do. Thank you for your time!

**Vash: **No problem with the explanation. I was glad to help. xD

**First Silvera:** Lol, I didn't really like that chapter because I didn't put my best effort into it.

**fanfic maniac:** Yeah, I supposed that chapter just jumped right out of the pink. And yup, it was all a dream until she woke up. –gasp-! An anti-Ran club? I'm not that much of an extremist, but if you can create one…I wanna carry the shotgun! Ooh, ooh, pick me! Pick me! xD Can I pull the trigger too?

**Takeru Yamamoto: **Lol, I still remember being an avid fan of Digimon, especially 02. But the part that really irked me was the ending. No Takari. T.T Plus, T.K. just looked…weird. As for the dream…just wait and see. xD

**b:** Heh, seems the chapter had almost everyone fooled. xD Heyo, Sir FAL!

**anime-obsession260:** Oh, you wanted the update soon? Oops. xD

**PK:** -ego inflates- Yeah, I know. I'm so clever. xD –slips on a banana peel- Wah! –thud-

**DestinyFate:** Good, good. I just hope I continue to meet your expectations. If not…drop a few complaints. I love those. X)

**Kanika Meskhenet:** Lol, we share a mutual dislike for Ran. It's sad how Shinichi is so madly in love with her. . 

**Genjy0-Sanz0:** Lol, you remind me of someone cheering on their favorite soccer player or something. xD Thanks.

**Anime obsessed fan:** I'm not trying to make Ai as the type to constantly seek revenge. I think she just seems more like that because you can read her thoughts here. xD Actually, from what I've read up to in the manga, her eye color is blue. I got the idea from a genetics lesson in science class last year. Like I said, a blue eye color is a recessive trait, and brown is dominant. A dominant gene will always show up over a recessive one. Blue eyes are prominent in Europeans (Shiho's mother) and brown for the Japanese (Shiho's father). According to that alone, it would mean that both Akemi and Shiho should have brown eyes and not blue. You can correct me if I'm wrong. But I still like her blue eyes, and that's why I'm keeping them in this fic. xD Keep in mind that dreams can be wacky and nonsensical. They can also be different memories mixed together…

**goldmund:** I really like Ai too. xD She's one of my favorite anime/manga characters!

**m,lymlmjohmtml.ll: **Thank you, thank you.

**Alpha Draconis1: **Well, If you recall from chapter 6, Ai and Conan went into the burnt down building to save anything they could. Chapter 7 was an interlude, and then everything from the top of Chapter 8 until when she woke at four in the morning was a dream. I just left out the part where they went salvaging, arrived back at the Mouris' place, and fell asleep in Conan's room. –sigh- Maybe if I had just italicized her dream so many people wouldn't have became confused…

**wayupi:** Oh, don't worry. It is light blue. xD And it's taking long because my monitor died on me, so I have to use my friend's computer. The replacement monitor I got operated like- …erm, it was bad.


	10. The Water is Cruel, Kudo

**Updated March 27, 2005**

**A**/**N: I _knew_ I should've double checked her name! xD Thanks for telling me that, SN 1987A. Lol, now I'm going to change it, so I don't make a fool of myself again. Need to watch for those mistakes. **

"Do you have a nine?"

Ai silently handed the card over to Conan. She wasn't in the mood to talk, much less bluff and tell him, "Go fish." What Conan had said greatly disturbed her. His words wrapped themselves around her mind like a boa constrictor, squeezing her brain so violently, she'd swear it was about to explode.

She felt so confused at why she merited his passing words with such concentration, and then she would grow frustrated, because she was unable to come up with a reason as to why. Ai couldn't focus on the game. She wasn't able to recall anything her mouth had uttered through the duration of the game so far…

…She blinked at Conan's patient face. It was her turn, wasn't it? Sighing, she looked at her cards, wondering if it was possible for this game to become an Olympic sport. She promptly swung a mental golf club at herself for the ridiculous thought. Looking over her cards once more, Ai settled on asking for a five.

Conan shook his head and pointed to the deck of cards. She rolled her eyes. Was it really that hard for him to say the stupid words? Ai shifted her weight on the edge of the bed to make herself more comfortable, taking care not to upset anything in the process. Reaching over, she drew a card from the pile.

Ace of Spades.

_"Oh, joyous. Am I so much closer to death now?"_ She thought sarcastically when she remembered what spades represented. _"Kudo thinks I like to cry does he? Well, maybe I should start weeping over this card to prove his deduction correct."_ Ai screamed inside her mind, thoroughly vexed at the thought. _"I. Do. Not. Like. To. Cry." _She repeated this over and over like a mantra as if her sanity depended on it. But she still had no idea why it bothered her so much.

Leave it to Conan to remedy the situation. "Say, Haibara, may I ask you a personal question? By the way, do you have a Queen?"

"No. Go fish." Was her snappish response.

Even the miniature detective wasn't able to discern if Ai was answering his second question and ignoring the first, or if she was answering both at the same time. Taking a card from the deck, he repeated his first question.

"May I ask you a personal question?"

"You just did. Do you have a four?"

"No, that's not-"

Ai drew another card from the pile, saying, "It was a question directed at me. That's personal enough."

"Haibara…" Conan groaned exasperatedly at her logic. "Fine, allow me to rephrase that. May I ask you multiple personal questions?"

"Of course, you may. I just might not answer."

Figuring he was never going to get a straight answer, Conan just went on with it. "What was your life like serving the Black Organization?"

Her _I do not like to cry_ mantra was abruptly cut off. It left her wondering if Conan had listened to her at all when she went through her angst-filled bouts of depression. "That's a stupid question." She told him earnestly, without the annoyance portrayed in her mind.

"Did you have any friends there?" The miniature detective knew he had just voluntarily stepped onto a lake, but he just had to know. Too bad for Conan, the surface tension of water isn't all that strong. He was going to fall right in.

"…I had a few."

"Who were they?" When he saw Ai hesitating, he added in a slightly disappointed tone, "You don't have to tell me if they were connected to the organization or not." Of course, if she did, it would've been a great bonus.

Even so, Ai stayed silent. She never should have told him anything at all. She knew Conan would try to find and interrogate them. Although she owed them nothing, she felt the need to protect their identities. The dead wish to rest in peace, don't they? Conan searching through files of their life wouldn't give that peace to them. But what could she do? Refusing to tell him would only result in Conan prying further, and telling him was out of the question.

Give the dead their rest…? Heh, that's a good one. Who was she trying to convince? Last she heard, all of them were alive and living their lives the way they wanted. She just didn't feel like going into detail.

_"Selfish…that's what I am."_

Oh, hey! She could avoid the question with one of those ambiguous answers. Why didn't she think of it earlier? All she had to do was get the timing right, and Conan would leave the subject alone. First things first: Run the current subject into a pothole and start a new one.

Ai had the perfect story and application in mind. With Conan's detective intuition, he'd know exactly what she was referring to. She glanced at the clock. They had been playing Go-fish for almost an hour. She had no clue how that happened, but whatever.

"Kudo, I thought you had a date."

Crimson seared across his face, the question leaving him flustered. "I-uh, yeah. I do have a date…" Conan cleared his throat, regaining his composure.

"Shouldn't you be preparing for it?"

Conan looked down at his cards, pretending to be immersed in them. "We're just going for ice cream…" He trailed off, his question suddenly taking a lower priority.

"Hmm? You made it sound like you were taking her on a trip to Europe."

"I did not!" He denied.

Smirking, Ai countered with, "Perhaps you caught my cold, Kudo? You seem positively red."

Embarrassed, he grumbled out, "Whatever…"

Ai blinked, having just noticed this. "Where is Mouri-san, anyway?"

"She's out with Sanako. Ran said she wanted some time to think all this over, so I'm meeting her at the creamery."

"I imagine she would need some time to accept this." Ai said, nodding her head. "I mean, to find out so suddenly that the man of her dreams is some vertically-challenged child…My sympathy goes out to her for the hardships she faces."

"Yeah, I know what you—hey! I am not short." He protested.

With a smug grin, Ai slid off the bed and stood tall. "Care to prove that?" She fanned out her cards and held them face-down at chin level. "Shorty."

"Tch.", Conan scoffed, taking on her challenge. He put the cards in his pocket and grabbed a ruler and pencil from the desk. He measured her height at the wall first.

But, Conan was standing a bit too close for her to be comfortable with. With his hands around both sides of her head, it made her more skittish around him than ever. She tried everything to divert her attention. She stared at the clock, fiddled with her collar, looked away, shrank back against the wall (but that only make Conan step closer), and drummed her fingers anxiously on the wall.

This was a most cruel and unusual punishment for the teasing she gave him. Was Conan even aware of the effect he held on her?

_"What's taking him so long? Shouldn't he be done by now? Oh, hurry it up, Kudo! The longer you stand there, the more I want to hug you so hard you turn every color of the rainbow!"_ Ai never felt so embarrassed in her life. She couldn't believe that Conan had her feeling like a giddy little school girl. He had better move quick, for Ai feared she was losing her mentality.

This adverse affect was most unacceptable. She just had to calm down and gather herself, right? She didn't have to make such a big deal out of this. It was just Conan…who was suddenly, quite nearly, leaning on her! Luckily for her reputation, the squeak of surprise that sounded throughout her mind was not voiced by her mouth as well.

"Ku-Kudo! Do you think I could _move_ first?" Ai tried her best to escape from his alluring range without touching him at all, but it was impossible. Ai was stuck there with a slight blush tinting her cheeks while Conan measured his own height.

"Hold on…hey, quit moving, you're messing up my line."

_"Messing up your line? You're messing up my mind! Please, just mark it and go! Ugh…if I knew calling you short would've led to this, I'd ban that word and any other synonymous to that from my vocabulary. You're taking your time at a much too antagonizing speed…"_

When Conan stepped away from her, Ai let out her breath she hadn't known she was holding. Good thing Conan took it as a sigh of boredom. He wasn't blessed with the privilege to read Ai's thoughts.

"Ha! You see that, Haibara?" He asked triumphantly, pointing to the wall at the higher line.

"Of course, I don't. I simply cherish the time I spend staring at walls." She drawled out, covering her erratic emotions with her sarcasm. "Yes, I do. And that line is not yours, it's mine. I am taller than you, Kudo."

"I drew the line. I think I would know who it belonged to."

"Exactly. You drew the lines. I didn't see them. Who's to say that you aren't claiming mine as yours, hmm?"

"Why would I do something like that?"

"Maybe you were embarrassed to admit I was right."

He spluttered, "What? No! I was not."

"We are not going to start that." She deadpanned.

"Alright, fine. You are taller, okay? Sheesh…no need to blow this thing out of proportion. What's it take to please you these days? Humiliating me?"

"Somebody needs to keep your ego in check while Mouri-san isn't around. But, no. The only one you need to worry about pleasing is your wife. Just let me go my own way."

"Haibara…I didn't mean for you to take it personally like that. I just"

"Forget about it. Just be content with what you already have."

"No, I…"

"Kudo, have you ever heard of the story about a dog and his reflection?

"One day, the dog was walking home with a bone in his mouth, intending to eat it peacefully at home. He had to cross a plank lying over a running brook to reach it. As he walked over, he spotted his own reflection in the water. The dog saw a bone he simply had to have. So, he barked at the water, thinking it would scare away the dog that held it, but as he opened his mouth, the bone he was carrying dropped into the water and was swept away by the currents. Shocked at the loss, he jumped right in after it, only to discover he couldn't swim.

"Learn something from that fable, will you, Kudo?" Ai placed her cards on the bed and walked out the door.

Conan didn't stop her this time. Sighing, he sat back on the bed, looking over their game. He was tied 8-8 with Ai. Curious, he looked over her cards and found one last pair she could've gotten from him. With a sad smile he said, "Here…I'll give my heart to you." He laid the Ace of Hearts and the Ace of Spades over by her other pairs.

9-8, Ai won this around.

Conan shook his head slowly, wondering what came over him. He had to clean up this mess and meet Ran for ice-cream. But even so, he could not resist staring at the door, saying to himself, "Haibara sees only a foolish dog wanting more than he has for something he could not obtain. I see a dog willing to sacrifice everything he owned, including his life for someone he just encountered walking by."

Unbeknownst to Conan, Ai was standing outside with the door open just a crack when she initially heard him talking to himself. She had heard everything. Granted, his words were muffled by the time they reached her ears, but she heard them all. Her ears perked up when he started speaking again.

"Haibara, I'm drowning. Will you teach me how to swim?"

Ai suddenly shrank back from the door, quickly walking away.

"No…I don't want to." She muttered under her breath. "I don't want to give you any reason to go near the water. They're dangerous, Kudo. Why can't you just stay away?"

**A**/**N: Ho-hum. I know, I know…I'm building up on the characters a little too much and the actual story much too little. I can't help it. xD Bleh…Haibara seems a little too out of character. Okay, a lot. Especially her thoughts...then again, whose thoughts really match the words they say? I mean my thoughts are extremely random, sporadic, and happy-sounding, but my friends complain that I'm too quiet. And then when I do speak, they complain that I'm too sarcastic. It's a vicious cycle. ' This is somewhat frightening. I must recover her personality. Maybe I'll re-read the DC manga for a while. Anyway, if you didn't understand who and what Conan and Ai were referring to in this chapter, read between the lines. xD I can't make everything easy for you guys. **

**SN 1987A: **Lol, even though you had to go, you gave me the motivation I needed to write this chapter. xD Random…that's all I can say. But sadly, due to the randomness, I accomplished nothing much in this chapter. –sweatdrop- I feel like procrastinating again…bleh, maybe later.

**Crystal Snowflakes:** Would…er, this be counted as soon? xD Lol, sorry. I'l be sure to get a speedy update out this time.

**DestinyFate: **Hmm…Ran's in what I'd like to call post-traumatic shock right now. (Lol, I barely have any idea if that's correct.) Sonako's consoling her, but it's not a good thing. Who knows what sort of outrageous ideas she'll fill Ran's confused mind with? Oh wait. I do.

**Dagron:** So many questions to be answered…hmm. You'll have to wait even longer to find out. X.x The explanation's due after another chapter or so. I'll tell you this though; Professor Agasa hasn't been busy with only his inventions. There's a little something he's been doing behind their backs…

**Vash:** Bleh, you're welcome, of course! xD

**Anime obsessed fan:** Uh oh. If you were disappointed by the last chapter, I think this one just about crushed all hopes of a fast paced plotline. –sweatdrop-

**kanikameskhenet:** Lol, save some of Ai for Conan to hug! xD

**anime-obsession260** Yeah…it's one of the few card games I know how to play besides Cheat…and Poker. Oo

**jack-adam** Lol, I've tried to include some Go-fish in there. The way we play it where I live might be different where everyone else lives, so…the game could possibly be slightly different in this chapter. Oh well, hopefully, I haven't killed any of the basic rules.

**fanfic maniac:** A dictator? O.o I'll give you a jelly donut if you promise not to be one.

**wayupi** Lol, yeah, Conan's pretty much clueless. Or is he just confused? xD The guy's torn between wanting to know Ai better and getting back with Ran… -sigh- Let's just hope the poor chemist's heart isn't broken by the end of this.

**CrimsonCat:** Lol, I'll tell him that. Well, actually, I'll just let him read it. But him sacrificing his computer time would be giving him a little too much credit…To use his computer requires you to play three hours of basketball with him. Good gravy, the guy is nuts over the sport. I'd much rather play soccer. My ball handling skills for basketball are horrible.

**PK:** Lol, thanks. Now I just need to get the main plot up and running. xD

**fic revr: **Eh, pointless? No, that's alright. I prize pointlessness. xD I stick it on a pedestal and gaze in awe of it. Sorry about that long delay…sorry about this one too. ;

**First Silvera** Bah, don't worry about why I didn't like chapter 8. I have a ton of other things I don't like, but you shouldn't worry about them either. xD

**fakia** Whoo! Sweet. xD You semi-like Ai/Conan! And yeah…Gin is a creepy man, indeed. I'm going to give him even more reasons to be obsessed with Ai. I _had_ to put some mystery in this; otherwise the story would be a dud. I can't write fluff to save my life.


	11. Corkscrewed

She sighed, just wishing for this day to be over, even resorting to counting the seconds as they passed. Ai had the urge to do something akin to cursing Conan's good name till she was old and wrinkled. But she had better things to do. Right?

Trudging down the stairs, taking care to make as little sound as possible, Ai cleared an area on the couch to sit on. Piles of magazines and newspapers were stacked unceremoniously on the floor while cans of numerous beverages had to be dumped into the recycling bin.

She couldn't help but smile a bit. The mess reminded Ai of her college days when she was too young to care for messes, and Mackwell too busy to care for anything else at all. To this day, she still didn't know what to think of him as.

A close acquaintance? Homicidal babysitter? Cruel guardian? Sarcastic brother?

Maybe a little bit of everything. Although, crazed, overzealous alchemist might've suited him best.

She curled in her spot on the couch, hoping Conan wouldn't come down just yet. Ai wanted to be as far away as possible from him at the moment, but she wasn't all that eager to leave the house either.

She thought of herself as some stupid, indecisive, little girl whose mind and emotions were really thrown out of whack by one egotistical male.

"I'm going out now."

Ai waved carelessly from where she was. "Don't forget to close the door."

Conan gave her a look of—disappointment? And then stepped out.

Ai shrugged it off, figuring it was just her imagination.

_Ring, ring._

The man looked away from what he what doing and walked over to pick up the phone. "_Guten Morgan_."

"Hello, yes, this is Yoshiro Ayane from the Japanese Social Services. May I please speak to Professor Agasa Hiroshi?" A woman on the other end spoke in Japanese.

He smiled thinly and returned his reply in Japanese. "I'm sorry, the professor isn't available. Would you like to leave a message, Miss Yoshiro?"

"Who am I speaking with?"

"This is Vincent, his assistant."

"Please tell him that I called concerning the whereabouts of his adopted daughter, Haibara Ai and property damage. He can contact me at…"

The man had tuned out the woman at this point. Something else had caught his attention, and he was intent on checking it out. He stepped around a slumped bloody figure and turned to a burly man standing by the door.

"Quickly." He spoke to him. "Gather the documents and meet me at the rendezvous in an hour. Take anything that would possibly identify him and leave no traces."

The other man nodded, showing that he understood and slipped on a pair of latex gloves, beginning his search. "Yes, Aniki." And despite his size, he was surprising quiet.

The other stepped out the door chuckling. "Adopted a daughter, Benedictine? Heh, this won't do. Not at all." He tilted his black hat down low enough to cover his eyes and pocketed his hands in his black trench coat. He wasn't sure why, but one word—or rather, name, kept echoing in his mind.

_"Sherry."_

Ai was about to open the door when she sneezed. She shook her head and hoped it wasn't another cold.

_Ding dong, ding dong!_

She mumbled something about impatient people and asked who it was.

"I'm Hattori from the clean up site at that burnt down building, and I was told I could find the person who lived there here." Claimed a man outside.

Curious, but cautious, Ai cracked the door open. "Yes…that's true. May I ask why you are looking for this person?"

"We found what looks like a suitcase under the rubble. Here." He slid said suitcase through the door and left.

Ai blinked, looking at the thing. She never would've imagined Professor Agasa having something like this in his house. It looked like one of those titanium suitcases that carried expensive or fragile things like maybe a bomb or millions of dollars. Well, it certainly looked the part. It even had a combination lock.

The first thing she wondered was if it was a bomb.

Then she ruled out the thought. If someone really wanted to blow her up, the bomb wouldn't have been placed at Professor Agasa house, and certainly not buried under all that rubble like the guy had said. But, despite her reasoning, Ai couldn't help but press her ear against it, listening for anything suspicious.

She fiddled with the dials, wondering if the wrong combination would trigger an explosion.

Maybe she was a bit too fatalistic.

What she wanted to do was call Professor Agasa, but he left her without any information to contact him. All she knew was that he was somewhere in Germany. Well, death by a bomb at point blank didn't sound too bad.

"Hmm…three digits…"

Always try the obvious first, right?

000? Nope.

111? Not that either.

222? Boy, isn't this random?

333? –cough-

444? Guess not.

555? Maybe I was a little too hopeful.

666? Mark of the Devil?

777? Jackpot! Hey! What the…?

The top popped open and nearly took her nose with it. Ai fell over from surprise. "_Triple seven…jackpot, but corny_." She thought. Ai looked at her prize. Inside were…

Odd looking rollerblades.

Two identical wire thin earpieces.

A bunch of strangely detailed notes and diagrams.

A funky looking contraption that seemed familiar. A motor maybe.

And pictures.

She ignored everything else and went straight for the pictures. Ai carefully examined each of them carefully. The ones in the front seemed to be in worse condition than the ones behind it. She realized it was the same person in each picture, each one when the person gradually aged. They seemed to be taken from all around the world as the backgrounds differed like water and oil. Some of them were taken with a group of people, some smiling and others scowling.

The same person that kept popping up in each photograph was hauntingly familiar. She just couldn't match the face with a name. Some of them were obvious where they were taken like the one with the Eiffel Tower in the background. Or another with the big Hollywood sign.

The ones of him in New Zealand made her crack a smile. One had a big sheepdog with its tongue hanging out about to pounce him from behind when the picture was taken. The camera had caught the action like an excerpt from time.

Slowly as she came near the end, the man in the pictures grew increasingly familiar. She also noted another boy in his late teens that stood beside the man. Now two people she thought she recognized.

Ai was become more and more suspicious by the second. Something about those two standing together made her skin crawl. Then, she had it. That boy…he…that—there was no mistaking it!

That was Mackwell!

But who was that other person? She nabbed the last one at the back, the most recent, and to her shock, the man who was in all those photos was Professor Agasa himself. She sat there stunned, wondering why that hadn't occurred to her sooner. All this _was_ found at his house.

The sudden realization that Mackwell and Professor Agasa knew each other backhanded her in the face.

Her mind exploded into numerous possibilities of how that was possible. If he was connected to the Black Organization in any way…

"_Oh. Holy. Freaking. Shit."_

But she could always tell if the person was part of _them_, right? But what if when he was still in his prime…maybe he had quit long ago…Ai didn't know how far back the organization extended…even her parents were a part of it…

There had to be a logical explanation for all this.

"_Professor Agasa was once part of the Black Organization, and I hadn't the foggiest clue about it. Talk about screwed over…what more don't I know?"_

She sighed, and picked up the photos she hadn't seen yet. Apparently, Ai dropped them at the right time, because the rest of these pictures contained a mechanical behemoth in them.

If seeing Mackwell and Professor Agasa standing together wasn't shellshocking enough, this was. This…these were pictures of Project Theriac! There was no mistaking it. After all, she had the pleasure of experiencing was it did up close and personal.

_"Ladies and gentlemen! It is an honor to stand before you today and present to you the Elixir of Life: Project Theriac!" Polite applauses sounded around the ballroom where the demonstration was taking place. Many were excited but the rest sat in disbelief as Mackwell set the final preparations. _

_Project Theriac was designed with only one purpose in mind: to cure the ultimate disease. _

_Death._

_Mackwell believed that if you could take the human regeneration process and kick it to high speeds, it was possible to continuously heal our deteriorating bodies, in short, you'd never age. With the help of nanobots, so small and light weight that you'd need the most powerful microscopes to see, injected into your body, they'd boost your physical performance much higher than anyone thought possible. _

_Shiho still looked uncertain about the whole thing. Sure, the machine was big and impressive, but there were so many things that could go wrong…_

_She had heard many times how his associates deemed Mackwell insane. They helped him build it, but all of them agreed that Theriac wouldn't be able to handle human specimens just yet. They hadn't even got it to work with lab rats._

_Mackwell refused to listen to them. Even the organization threatened to pull the plug on the project if they couldn't come up with any progress. He absolutely refused to let years of his hard work go down the drain like that. His team abandoned him. They claimed it impossible and they refused to have their reputations go down like he would._

_He was forced to work alone, but the project was too much of a strain on him. In his desperation, he asked Shiho for her help. The man was distraught, falling apart. She couldn't say no. _

_In her spare time, she helped him improve and tweak little things to the best of her knowledge that in the end, made a substantial difference, and for that, Mackwell was grateful. At times, Shiho had to skip her classes just to overcome the smallest of problems. In her free time, she studied numerous blueprints, engraving each and every one of them into her mind._

_Her priorities shifted from the Apotoxin and her studies to Theriac, and that deeply crippled her grades. Her professors questioned her, and what little friends she made there also noticed how weary and distracted she looked everyday. Her team on the Apotoxin was ready to kick her out if she didn't start pulling her weight._

_Now it wasn't just about Mackwell's wellbeing, her life was slowly falling apart as well._

_But today, today was when they would prove it all._

_He stepped into the machine and nodded to Shiho. She hesitated for a brief second, then flipped the switch. _

_For a moment, everything seemed to go exactly as they planned. That was until they heard Mackwell's bloodcurdling scream._

_Shiho thought her heart froze._

Ai still remembered that horrible night. She wasn't able to attend his funeral a few days later. How would she explain how she knew him anyway?

She flipped the picture over when she felt something written on the back. One word was scrawled diagonally across it.

"Godspeed."

**A**/**N: I'm back, I'm back! Whoo! –does a little dance- Things are really thrown for a loop in this chapter. Hope I didn't lose any of you mid-way through it. xD Now that I'm finally settled in my new home, I've got more time to write. I think. X.x Oh, by the way, this fanfic is an AU, meaning it takes place in an alternate universe. **

**SN 1987A:** -showers you with chocolate chip cookies- x3 One thank you is simply not enough. But you beat me at updating this time. oo Grr. Lol. I'm just worried this chapter seems…fake. X.x I'm bad at building suspense.

**Kanika Meskhenet**People have been known to do strange things. Ai included. xD

**Crystal Snowflakes: **Oh…sooner? Eh heh…sorry. –sweatdrop-

**Fic revr:** I'm relieved that's how you feel. xD

**Fanfic Maniac:** Glazed donut…no can do. I ate 'em all. xD

**Anime obsessed fan:** Much thanks. –has a big grin- Well, the plot's getting a kick in the rear, so hopefully it starts moving along now. Good luck at understanding the last chapter. xD Although, it's been so long…you've had three months. Lol.

**Vash: **You give the best one-liners, you know that? Lol.

**Anime-obsession260:** Lol, tension between Conan and Ai. xD Is anyone hoping it's more than that?

**CrimsonCat:** He is, he is. –nods- Lol, and he's told me to tell you that he just likes the sport.

**jack-adam:** Lol. Gee, thanks for the, "doh". xD

**First Silvera:** Lol, do you think it could be considered as flirting? xD

**wayupi: **I hope this chapter answered your questions. I don't plan on giving up this story either. –grins-

**joeshen:** Heh, I wish.


	12. From the Eyes of Conan

Have you ever seen somebody's eyes dim? I thought I had whenever Ran was sad. Once, I had contacted Ran over the phone as Shinichi with Professor Agasa's obento fax machine in the bathroom. When I came out, Ran had looked so crestfallen.

"Cases, cases!" Was what she angrily repeated after my call. As Conan, the only thing I could do was meekly ask if my older alter ego had upset her once again. She'd calm down and give me that horridly sullen look in her eyes. I always felt so guilty.

It was almost unbearable.

But today…today when I lied to Haibara—as soon as I turned around, I wanted to seize my tongue and cut it off on the spot. She didn't know that, of course. Apparently, some of mother's magnificent acting skills rubbed off on me.

When I walked out the door, I didn't head towards the creamery like I had told Haibara. Instead, I took a walk in the park to bury myself in my guilt. The date with Ran was a lie. I never told Ran. Never. Every time I tried, I pulled out at the last second like the coward I was. Haibara was right. I am an idiot.

Damn it. I'm just a lying coward. How could someone like me possibly take down the Black Organization? She was right to call me a fool.

Just when I thought my confidence had hit rock bottom, I returned home only to find a mess of photos surrounding a crying girl. Like the cowardly boy I was, I just stood near the door. I didn't make a move to comfort her.

When she calmed down, she stared at me. I can't even begin to describe the blank feeling her eyes gave me. Somehow I found my voice and asked her what was wrong.

She told me everything was. When I asked her to elaborate further, I found out one of my most trusted friends was part of the Black Organization.

At first, I refused to believe it. In fact, I went as far as accusing her of lying. Haibara snapped to attention as if I had slapped her. She looked like she wanted to slap _me_.

I couldn't blame her.

Through a tightly strained jaw, she asked me to look through the photos and see for myself.

Did I mention that I was also a proud coward? I didn't take back my words after looking through the photographs. Not even after she explained Project Theriac to me. What I did was _yell_ at her, asking how she could lie about something like this. I refused to acknowledge Professor Agasa's connection to Project Theriac.

I was acting irrational. It was unacceptable.

I would bet my detective career that Haibara had never been more hurt than now. Her shoulders trembled as she glared at me silently. Like the idiot I was, I yelled even louder, demanding an explanation, not wanting to realize for even a second that she may be right and all I had to do was ask nicely for her to explain.

She shook her head, telling me to forget it and grabbed a few of the items in the suitcase.

I made a horrible mistake and told her not to steal any of Professor Agasa's belongings. I wish I _had_ cut off my tongue a few seconds sooner. Realizing I had gone too far, I opened my mouth to apologize, but Haibara was already climbing down the steps. I ran after her, grabbing her hand, and I was about to tell her I was sorry.

In a shameful moment of silence, I hesitated.

In one smooth movement, she turned and slapped me across the face then went skating the rest of the way out the door.

I couldn't believe it. I never thought she would do something like this. I always thought she would be by my side, helping me as I took down the Black Organization. Naïve as I was, I didn't think words—even ones as cruel as mine—would hurt Haibara.

Didn't I once promise to protect Haibara as long as I lived? Who am I kidding? I did the exact opposite of that. I sunk down against the wall. I buried my head in my hands, wishing I could turn back the hands of time for my grave miscalculations.

My throbbing cheek quickly reminded me what I had to do. There was no time for my dramatics. I grabbed my skateboard and was out the door, running on turbo. That stuff was faster than NOX. I never actually tested its maximum speed, but I figured now was as good a time as any. I had been depending on an ex-member of the organization all along.

Of course, Haibara was an ex-member as well, but it was different with Professor Agasa. He never told us. And I never found out.

Weaving amongst traffic, I activated the radar on my glasses and found Haibara. I placed the tracker on her when I grabbed her hand. For that, guilt stabbed me, but I quickly shoved it away into my very own Pandora's Box. It's not like I could've tracked her down using the Detective Boys' badges. She was never given one.

Haibara was moving fast. Almost as fast as I was, in fact. No doubt if it was an Agasa invention, the skates were a modified version of my skateboard. How the skates worked I had no idea, but I intended to ask Haibara herself.

At last, she stopped somewhere. Instead of slowing down, I sped up to her location. As I rounded the corner, I entered a maze of alleyways. I slowed my board to a low hum when I reached the area deep inside. According to my radar, she had to either be right under me or…above?

I glanced up, and sure enough Haibara was standing on a rusted fire escape above me. I would've been relieved to see her, except for the fact that she was aiming a gun at me.

Shit.

When did she have time to get something like that? The chances of picking up something like that on the ground were very low. She couldn't have had more than a few seconds to search for it before I arrived. In any case, my first priority was to avoid getting shot. My second was to haul her ass back home.

Heh, back home together. What an appealing thought. But this was hardly the time for daydreaming.

I barely made a move before she cocked the gun. She smiled at my frozen expression and told me in her usual soft voice that she would not hesitate to shoot me on one condition.

She wanted me to forget she ever existed and leave her alone.

Forget Haibara? As if that would ever happen. I rejected her offer without missing a beat.

The bullet ricocheted off the wall beside me. In that moment, the needle from my watch hit her neck, and her unconscious form slumped over the railing. Unfortunately, she was dangling too far over and fell. I lunged from the cloud of dust that surrounded me, possibly from the bullet, but tripped. Thankfully, I broke her fall anyway when she landed on my back.

But, damn, did that hurt. I am definitely not making it a hobby to catch falling girls. Contrary to popular belief, they are _not_ as light as we males imagine them to be.

Later, I would realize that the bullet Haibara shot at me was actually a hardened capsule that would shatter on impact after it was fired. I would also discover that the cloud of dust was not dust but a powdered version of my needles contained inside the capsule.

Right now, I would fall asleep on the ground with an equally drowsy Haibara using me as her pillow.

My last thought as I drifted off to sleep was that Sherlock Holmes would have handled this situation much better than I had. I was nothing compared to him. I was just…

…Just an incompetent tool.

It's a funny thing to wake up next to a girl in an alleyway. Well, maybe not quite so funny as it is heart-wrenching. How did it come to this? I felt so drained and defeated. There was something terribly wrong happening underfoot, and I swore to find out what.

With my scrawny pubescent arms, I lifted Haibara from where she lay and set positioned her safely on my skateboard. I sat behind her. If I had been a few years older, my hormones would be raging. Any of Haibara's miniscule movements had me highly aware of the fact she was sleeping in between my legs. Goddamn it, she was se—stunning.

My cheeks were probably glowing in the dark like neon rave sticks.

I could barely recall which turns I took in this alleyway labyrinth. Then again, I wasn't in a hurry either. Night was settling in, and it was difficult to see. Right, like that was supposed to be my excuse. With one arm wrapped securely around Haibara's sleeping form, I used my foot to gently push down the acceleration button on my skateboard. It's a good thing there turns here weren't sharp. I could lean into them without tipping us over.

If Haibara woke up, I knew I would have Hell to pay for this compromising position. Oh, well.

_Que Sera, Sera._

My mind involuntarily drifted to today's events. Everything happened so quickly, I could only react. There was barely time to think. Did I mention that guilt and I were now joined to the hip? I recalled the harsh words as I snapped at her. It hollowed out my chest cavity faster than watermelon set in front of a hungry kid.

Did I deserve to bring her back?

Narrowing my eyes into slits, I left that question unanswered.

**A/N: **So…yeah. Hi. It's been a long time, hasn't it? Incidentally, I had to read my work over again just to recall the plot. It was a long and painful read, let me tell you that. Reevaluating past works has never been my strong point. I suppose I'm too critical of myself, but that's how it is. This story seemed so immature. The voice in my writing completely slaughtered me. Haha, forgive me for what I've put you readers through. I'll try to remedy that from now on.

But most importantly, thank you. Thank you so much for your support.


	13. Like A Faustian Deal

They were half way back when Ai woke up in Conan's arms. She moved a slight inch to the left, tucking her head under his chin. Conan gently rested his head on top of hers. Ai had no desire to speak at the moment and neither did he. It seemed to be the best option as opposed to some other overly dramatic argument that would leave them screaming at each other. Conan's apology for his thoughtless actions from before was conveyed through his touch, and she forgave him by not pulling away. Each took a certain amount of comfort from the mutual contact.

Through telepathy or something of another, they agreed to write off the incident that occurred a few hours ago from their minds. An unspoken agreement. Conan wouldn't pursue the subject so long as Ai wouldn't repeat it.

She had to admit, he was giving her more credit than she deserved. After all, this certainly wasn't the first time she pointed a gun at him or ran away. The more she thought about it, the less sense it made, but Ai supposed she could be content with leaving this one aspect of Conan a mystery. If she were to count all the second chances he gave her, well, maybe she shouldn't jinx it.

The hum of the engine soon died and so did the skateboard's battery. A sigh escaped Conan's lips, tickling Ai's ear. Despite the slightly awkward silence between them, she couldn't help but duck her head to the side and laugh, covering her mouth. Conan gave her an astonished blink. She caught his look and waved it off.

"It's nothing." Her voice still carried a slight giggle. Ai rubbed her ear, trying to get the tingling sensation out from it. She slipped out from Conan's grasp and stood facing away from him. "Too bad we missed the undoubtedly romantic sunset," she remarked lightly.

Fighting back a blush, Conan picked up his solar-powered skateboard and cursed the short battery life. Hopefully one day, he wouldn't need an excuse to hold her. With a rueful smile he suggested they catch a bus or taxi.

"Do you have money for two?"

He didn't even have to pat down his pockets to check. He wasn't carrying anything but lint. His skateboard hit the pavement, and he pushed off. Ai skated on the air beside him.

…Wait—what?

"Haibara, are you…you're hovering!"

She graciously twirled a 360 in the air for him. "I was wondering when you would notice."

He cocked an eyebrow at her. "Sorry. I got used to seeing you on solid ground. In the future, I'll make it a habit to check on your feet," he delivered sarcastically.

Ai countered without missing a beat. "Please don't develop a fetish for them."

Conan rolled his eyes at her deadpan humor. In a way, she was as charming as a hippopotamus on a unicycle. Professor Agasa had really outdone himself this time though. Skating in the air…ha. Genius.

Suddenly, a thought clicked in Conan's mind. "Haibara, when is Professor Agasa supposed to get back?"

She muttered a curse before asking, "Kudo, what time is—"

But she never finished that sentence. It didn't matter anymore. What mattered was that the two of them were out in the middle of the night on a street devoid of people. Her shoes sunk to the floor with a slight _tip-tap_. An empty street except for one small detail. Frozen without thought, her eyes were glued staring straight ahead. "Kudo, run," she let out in a breathless whisper.

Because right in front of them sat a dainty little black Porsche parked at the sidewalk, model number 356A.

Unease washed down Ai's spine accompanied by shivers. It was impossible. How did she not sense anything? Was it really his car? Was he waiting for them? But Conan was three steps ahead of Ai. He was off his skateboard and dragging her ass behind a wall for cover as the car door opened.

"Good evening, detective, Sherry." His all too familiar voice was slightly strained across the distance between them.

Well, if that didn't just about kill off her anxiety, Ai would be damned. She could barely hear Conan over the sound of her rapid heartbeats. A familiar panic surged through her system, kicking her flight-or-fight response into high gear. Bile rose in her throat at the thought of being caught in the dark with Gin. Unwanted memories resurfaced, blanketing her mind when she should've been deliberating her next course of action.

Conan wasn't any better off though. He knew they were cornered. There was nowhere to run, not with a gun and Gin's steady aim. Everything at his immediate disposal was useless. He took off his glasses and angled them around the corner, hoping to catch a reflection of Gin's distance from them.

Conan was not disappointed. The man was taking slow, measured steps toward their location, but what Conan found most distressing was that Gin's partner Vodka was nowhere to be found. Only one car door opened, right? It wouldn't have made sense for both BO members to exit from the same door. Was it safe to assume Gin was alone?

Maybe he could divert Gin's attention so Ai could escape. Conan glanced at the quivering mess by his side.

Nope, not gonna work.

Damn it, he wasn't going to let that plan go so easily. It was the only thing they had. "Oy, Haibara," Conan spoke in a low tone. She made no signs of acknowledgement. "Oy!" He shook her trembling form.

Ai fell out of her stupor then fixed Conan with a fierce glare. "Don't you dare think of fighting against him."

He face fell in comical deadpan. "Oy…you're really not in any position to argue."

"Sorry, hadn't realized you wanted missionary," she snapped.

"Haibara, I'll give it to you whatever way you prefer if we get out of this alive."

Thankful her state of mind had returned to semi-normalcy, Conan checked Gin's slow progress. The guy was staring at their hiding spot and tilting his head to the side with boredom, rolling Conan's skateboard back and forth with a foot. One hand held a gun, and Gin was close enough for each shot to hit its intended target.

"If you two have enough time to flirt with each other over there," Gin drawled with a hint of amusement, "perhaps I can join the conversation."

Conan bristled with annoyance. "Why are you here, Gin?"

"Can't a man greet his old colleague every once in a while?"

"Looking up the end of your gun barrel isn't what I'd call friendly."

Gin laughed. "Fair enough." He holstered the gun with a smirk, knowing Conan was watching his actions.

Conan gritted his teeth. "Gin, why are you here?" He repeated.

The man in question ignored Conan. "Sherry, come out," he summoned. "I have information relevant to your interests."

"Information is only worth so much to me when I'm dead," she returned.

"Spare me a little credit, _Love_. I took my medication today." His smirk grew wider from the air of confusion that undoubtedly settled over Conan.

Ai hesitated, unsure if she should keep talking. "Which one?"

"Lithane," he stated proudly.

"Regularly?"

Conan watched him shrug and talk about his doses as if Ai was his physician. "A day or two off, but like it really matters," he finished offhandedly.

"Liar," Ai said softly but enough for Gin to hear.

"Then do you propose we sit here an hour for my medication to fully settle in?" The man growled and lit a cigarette. His eyes followed the thin trail of smoke up to the streetlamp above him.

Conan decided it was now or never. He jumped out from behind their spot before Ai could pull him back and pointed his watch at Gin. He held his aim, ready to fire at the slightest movement.

Gin snarled, biting down on his cigarette. "Put that useless thing away, boy. I declared a ceasefire, and it is in your best interests to respect it. Furthermore," he kicked the skateboard over to Conan, "this is a private matter to discuss with Sherry. Get out of here before I change my mind."

Glaring through the lens of his watch, Conan asked, "and if I don't?" challenging him, stopping the rolling board.

Returning the look, Gin scoffed, "that's her choice to make. I could care less."

Ai, who had been praying for Conan's speedy departure into the afterlife after testing Gin's patience, finally looked up at the battle of testosterone between the two males. Gin kept to the temporary truce. Knowing this, she collected herself well enough now and could speak without tremors in her voice.

"What could be so important for you to swallow your bloodlust, Gin?"

"Ah, excellent," he smiled. "I have business with you, sans the end of my gun."

Ignoring his tasteless innuendo, Ai continued. "Yes, you've made that point decidedly clear," she said with some annoyance, "but what about? Kudo can stay, regardless."

"I'll speak when I see you, Love."

"Gin!"

"Mackwell." Was all he gave away.

"What?" This one came from Conan.

Ai pursed her lips for a quick moment then stepped out. She narrowed her eyes at Gin and said, "he's dead. That's all you need to know."

Knowing he finally hooked Ai, Gin laughed. "An entire section of the Black Organization would beg to differ, Love." He had taken a liking to that certain term of endearment after seeing Conan's face cloud over each time he said it. He watched the slow disbelief spread across Ai's face. "Your dear brother Lance is alive, Alice." It was difficult to keep himself from outright laughing at Conan's confusion.

She tried her best to suppress the spreading hope. "That's impossible," Ai bit her lip, "I watched him die that day."

Gin noted that Conan remained silent, and he inwardly congratulated the detective for knowing his place. This wasn't something Conan could casually demand explanations about, so Gin decided to volunteer one. "Project Theriac was a success. The Organization no longer wishes your termination. I am under specific order to retrieve you."

"I expect you didn't come here thinking I'd agree."

"No, I did not. The Organization doesn't suit you anymore."

"Gin…" Ai began with a warning tone.

He laughed. "Don't get so cocky just because I've put away my gun. I wouldn't be so careless as to let our secrets spill." Gin smirked at Conan's glare as he made it obvious they shared a history that the detective was kept in the dark from. He turned back to Ai with a charming smile. "Sorry. Slip of the tongue, Love."

She sighed and let it side. "You can show just how apologetic you are by telling me why they want me and how Mackwell is alive."

Conan was slightly more than surprised when Gin readily complied. "Simple, really. That bastard cheated death. You and Mackwell were the ones who finalized the entire project. Do you honestly think the Organization would let a chance like this slip by? They know you're still alive. Of course—" His grin turned feral. "There are quite a few members who would rather have your corpse. The—"

"—Medical division. Project Theriac would hit them harder than the Armageddon. In fact, the Armageddon would be ideal for maximum profit," Ai finished. She mulled it over in her mind then asked, "so I assume Mackwell's theory was correct?"

"That's classified information, Sherry."

"Bastard," she muttered. Curiosity was getting the better of her. "You've already let out that he succeeded. What's the harm in telling me how?"

"What if it was a fluke?" He raised an eyebrow pointedly at Ai.

She held her tongue, unable to deny her Apotoxin failure but then switched tactics. "Alright, fine. Say I believe. Where do you fall into this mess, Gin?"

He let the butt of his cigarette slip from his mouth and stomped it out. "I've also become a target."

"But you've got nothing to do with this project." Her voice betrayed her confusion and disbelief.

"Correct," he confirmed, "but I have everything to do with Mackwell himself. Let's not forget he was my mentor." Gin frowned at her. "You can't possibly have forgotten how the Organization works. Scapegoats are constantly framed and disposed of."

Ai fixed him with a dark look. "You are the last person who needs to remind me of that."

"Your sister's probably in a better place." He commented casually with an indifferent shrug.

"Coming from you, I'm sure it was an act of mercy," Ai snapped at the man, trying to concentrate on something other than the fact her own words held a bit of truth to them.

Conan risked a concerned glance at Ai, giving Gin a chance to mockingly take a step forward during the brief lapse in scrutiny. The detective gritted his teeth in thinly veiled anger but chose to keep his silence, knowing that he was at a disadvantage even with his watch aimed at the man.

"I couldn't help it," Gin explained, and offered nothing more for the immature act than a shrug to go with his smugly satisfied smirk.

Ai was feeling relaxed enough to give Gin a mildly exasperated look, and when he quite unexpectedly winked at her, she remembered just how much the sides of his personalities differed. Under any other circumstance, she was sure to have fled at the first sign of him, but some of the old concern she held for him in the past resurfaced. Granted, she loathed the man, feared, and was even disgusted by him, but hate was something she could not manage.

Knowing that Gin possessed a faulty chemical system made it too difficult to thoughtlessly blame him for his past behavior. Of course, she wasn't completely letting him off the hook, but goddamn morality. Now that he was in a similar position she and Conan were in, being hunted by the Organization, Ai grudgingly admitted a bit of her sympathy went out to him, especially since he voluntarily chose to track her down for help.

What a painfully ironic twist of events. Fuck.

She wasn't so blind as to consider this a cheap hoax to capture her, but exercising caution was better than to err. Granted, there was nothing to guarantee truth behind his words, but she knew Gin would not be so quick to use Mackwell's name lightly.

Or maybe she was too hopeful he turned over a new leaf? No, that couldn't be it. This was exactly what Gin called it—a truce, one that she had already agreed to accept without meaning to, at least not until she heard his terms.

No, fuck his terms. She'd set her own. Sending Conan a silent apology, knowing this would probably seem like she was going to abandon him as well, Ai made Gin an offer their lives depended on, placing a huge gamble on how much he valued their past.

"Gin," she began, forcing the familiar anxiety she had come to associate with the man away, "promise me a few things."

The boy in front of her stiffened but kept from voicing his apparent disapproval, so Ai wasn't sure how upset Conan was. Again, she sent a mental apology his way and made sure to clear up any misunderstandings later. Honestly, she couldn't determine whether or not the miracle that kept him quiet for so long was a blessing or curse foreshadowing his temper, but she was very thankful for it.

On the other hand, she could see Gin's frown quite clearly. He didn't bother to keep his lip from curling in a decidedly less than pleasant manner, murmuring, "conditions, Sherry? _Quid pro quo_, I trust?"

Oh, for the love of—if she couldn't even remember to verbalize something as simple as her end of the end of the deal, just what did she expect to accomplish? But despite the bout of panic that erupted from angering the man, she tried not to let it show, smoothly replying, "_do ut des_."

A blank look momentarily crossed Gin's face before he laughed. "I had almost forgotten what that meant," he confessed with genuine amusement.

Conan watched them in disbelief. Will wonders ever cease?

Gin's mood brightened, and it seemed that he was going to be most agreeable, so Ai took her chances and continued. "I'm not demanding your cooperation or setting conditions, Gin." She ventured slowly, choosing her words carefully, testing the waters. "I'm asking if you'll promise me."

"I will," he answered easily, not sparing a second thought to what she would ask of him.

Really, it just baffled Conan how readily Gin agreed with Ai. In a way, it made him ashamed of himself, because shit, if this was a competition, he'd be losing to Gin in terms of devotion and trust. He thought about this new revelation for a second.

Oh, hell no. It probably wasn't what he was thinking, but if it was, Conan now had a new reason to despise the man.

Gin watched the emotions play across the detective's face then grinned when the boy reached a conclusion to his thoughts with a mix of horrified denial and shocked disgust. Conan did the only thing he could think of at the moment and retorted with a mental _fuck you._

Unaware of this exchange between the males, Ai continued. "Promise me you will not, directly or indirectly, bring any harm to us."

He sighed. "Sherry, you're too predictable. I promise, and for the record, I hadn't planned to. Just a bit of teasing was all. Although," he paused to consider something. "I cannot guarantee safety. Is this acceptable?"

She raised an eyebrow at him. "Well, if you're going to be considerate enough to inform me beforehand, I suppose I have no choice but to agree."

He nodded and waved for her to go on.

Ai let out a shaky breath. This was going a lot smoother than she imagined, but she would only push her luck so far. There was only one more thing she had to ask. "Will you promise…" She trailed off, biting her lip.

Gin narrowed his eyes impatiently.

Swallowing nervously, she asked in a significantly smaller voice, "promise to take your medication regularly?"

"If you remind me, Love."

"Promise me, Gin."

"…I promise."

"T-that's all I'll ask then."

"Spectacular." He turned abruptly and walked away. "Get in the car," he ordered without turning around, climbing into the driver's seat.

Conan turned to Ai as she walked by him and gave her a deadpan look. "You're not actually going to—"

She grabbed his outstretched hand, dragging him along. "Think of it as the lesser of two evils," she muttered under her breath. "Either we're tricked by Gin and shot in his car, or we get captured or killed by whoever's been following him around."

Sighing, Conan followed her lead. "And my horoscope said today was a good day."

**A/N: I'm amazed you guys are still sticking around. Comments and criticisms will be accepted with childish glee.**


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